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Funeral Songs

Introduction

Planning a funeral is difficult enough without having the responsibility of choosing the perfect song for the service. There are plenty of options, but that almost makes it harder. It is an impossible task to find the most fitting and appropriate funeral music.  

There are the usual choices such as Frank Sinatra’s “My Way” and Eva Cassidy’s “Over The Rainbow”. But these are just the popular options.

The song chosen to memorialize the deceased loved one should be both personal and meaningful.

Whether it be sung by a choir, performed by a special friend, played instrumentally, or as background music, the guide below might help you find inspiration in choosing the perfect song to remember your loved one.

in-Valhalla Favorite

Before we list songs by relationship, I wanted to share my favorite funeral song for your consideration. It is one of the most memorable and striking songs I’ve heard. Here’s a link to the original, by Johnny Cash. I prefer the cover for the 2019 war film 1917.

Wayfaring Stranger – Performed by Jos Slovick
I am a poor wayfaring stranger
I'm travellin' through this world of woe
Yet there's no sickness, toil, nor danger
In that bright land to which I go

I'm going there to see my Father
I'm going there, no more to roam
I'm only going over Jordan
I'm only going over home

I know dark clouds will gather 'round me
I know my way is rough and steep
But golden fields lie just before me
Where God's redeemed shall ever sleep

I'm going home to see my mother
And all my loved ones who've gone on
I'm only going over Jordan
I'm only going over home

I am a poor wayfarin' stranger
I'm travellin' through this world of woe
Yet there's no sickness, toil, nor danger
In that bright land to which I go

I'm going there to see my Father
I'm going there, no more to roam
I'm only going over Jordan
I'm only going over home

Funeral Songs According to Relationship

When picking a fitting funeral song for a loved one, it helps to pay attention to the lyrical content. The lyrics behind a song sometimes explicitly narrate the message we might want to express but could not explicitly say. After all, music is a good way to cope with loss.

Listed below are the best funeral songs we could find according to your relationship with your special person.

Songs for Mom

  1. Celine Dion – Goodbye’s The Saddest Word 

This ballad is a beautiful dedication to the loss of a mom. In this Celine Dion song, she sings “There is no other love like a mother’s love for her child,” which poignantly encapsulates motherly love.

  1. Elvis Presley – Mama Liked The Roses

A timeless Elvis Presley classic, this song perfectly captures love and loss for a mother through personal recollections. With its nostalgic lyrics singing “Oh, mama liked the roses and when she had the time, she’d decorate the living room, for all us kids to see, ” this song is fitting in times of grief and remembrance for a mother. 

  1. Ed Sheeran – Supermarket Flowers

Ed Sheeran wrote this song for his late grandmother from the perspective of her mom. The lyrics vividly narrate the personal longing for a mother who recently passed. In the song, Sheeran sings “You were an angel in the shape of my mum,” which sums up the appreciation for the grace and kindness of a mother.

Songs for Dad

  1. Luther Vandross – Dance With My Father

Luther Vandross’ “Dance With My Father” is popular for a reason. It is emotional, poignant, and resonates with every father. With its heart-wrenching lyrics reminiscing life and loss, it perfectly evokes ache, nostalgia, and appreciation of a loved one.

  1. Josh Groban – You Raise Me Up

Fathers are sometimes heroic figures to their children. If you want to honor your dad who had a monumental role in your life, Josh Groban’s ballad would perfectly express your love and appreciation.

  1. Holly Dunn – Daddy’s Hands

This song is full of nostalgia for a father who formed wonderful memories with his family. In Holly Dunn’s lyrics, she reminisces about the sacrifices her father has made and appreciates him as she sings, “If I could do things over, I’d live my life again, and never take for granted the love in daddy’s hands.”

Songs for A Child

  1. Eric Clapton – Tears In Heaven

Eric Clapton wrote this song following the death of his young son. “Beyond the door there’s peace I’m sure, And I know there’ll be no more tears in heaven,” he sings. This song is both sentimental and beautiful as Clapton imagines his son being in heaven.

  1. Billy Joel – Lullabye

This Billy Joel ballad sings from a perspective of a father trying to answer his daughter’s questions about death. In the song he sings, “Goodnight my angel, time to close your eyes” which serves as a dedication for a child to say goodbye to.

  1. Chris Daughtry – Gone Too Soon

In this song, Chris Daughtry sings about the sadness over the loss of a young person. This song reflects on a child who would have lived a life if anything had been different. In the song, Daughtry sings “Not a day goes by that I don’t think of you, I’m always asking why this crazy world had to lose, such a ray of light we never knew.”

Songs for A Friend

  1. Mariah Carey – One Sweet Day

In Mariah Carey’s Song “One Sweet Day”, she sings about the loss of a special person and knows in her heart that she’ll see them again one day. The lyrics can resonate with anyone who has experienced grief and longing for any loved one.

  1. James Taylor – Fire and Rain

 In “Fire and Rain”, James Taylor sings about the death of a childhood friend. His lyrics feature an emotional take on loss and redemption. “Just yesterday morning they let me know you were gone, I just can’t remember who to send it to, Susanne the plans they made put an end to you”, he sings.

  1. Wiz Khalifa – See You Again ft. Charlie Puth

This modern song was dedicated to the late Paul Walker after his accident. The fitting lyrics narrate how the singer looks forward to seeing his friend again. “We’ve come a long way from where we began / Oh, I’ll tell you all about it when I see you again,” he sings.

Choosing the Best Song

These are just a few examples of fitting songs you could use to honor a special person. Another way to choose the best funeral music is to consider the favorite songs or genre of your loved one. Try picking a song that would best remind you of the person you are dedicating it to. Keep in mind

  • The deceased’s musical taste
  • The occasion (e.g., funeral, memorial service, or celebration of life)
  • The religious or cultural beliefs of the deceased and their loved ones
  • The desired mood or atmosphere of the service or memorial
  • The length of the song
  • The availability of a live performer or recording

To see popular options from the past, check out this article, where funeral home directors are surveyed on the most frequent song choices.

Traditional Options

Some traditional songs that are often played at services or memorials include:

  • “Amazing Grace”
  • “Abide with Me”
  • “How Great Thou Art”
  • “I’ll Fly Away”
  • “Amazing Peace”
  • “What a Friend We Have in Jesus”
  • “Nearer, My God, to Thee”
  • “Rock of Ages”
  • “O Death, Where Is Thy Sting?”
  • “Hallelujah”

Nontraditional Options

There are many non-traditional songs that can be played at services or memorials, such as:

  • “The Sound of Silence” by Simon & Garfunkel
  • “Bridge Over Troubled Water” by Simon & Garfunkel
  • “Imagine” by John Lennon
  • “What a Wonderful World” by Louis Armstrong
  • “Hallelujah” by Leonard Cohen
  • “I Will Survive” by Gloria Gaynor
  • “Dancing Queen” by ABBA
  • “Don’t Stop Believin'” by Journey
  • “Sweet Caroline” by Neil Diamond
  • “Free Fallin'” by Tom Petty

FAQ

How can I choose a song that is both meaningful and appropriate for a service or memorial?

The best way is to consider the deceased’s musical taste, the occasion, the religious or cultural beliefs of the deceased and their loved ones, the desired mood or atmosphere of the service or memorial, the length of the song, and the availability of a live performer or recording. It is also important to remember that there is no right or wrong answer when it comes to choosing a song for a service or memorial. The most important thing is to choose a song that will help to honor and celebrate the life of the deceased.

What should I do if I can’t decide on a song?

If you can’t decide on a song, you can ask friends, family, or other loved ones for their suggestions. You can also talk to your funeral director. If you’re still having trouble, you can always hire a professional music director to help you choose the perfect songs for your service or memorial.

What if I don’t like any of the traditional songs?

If you don’t like any of the traditional songs, you can choose a non-traditional song that has special meaning to you or to the deceased. You can also choose a song that is from the deceased’s favorite genre of music.

What if I (or someone else) want to sing a song at the service or memorial?

If you want to sing a song at the service or memorial, you should talk to the funeral director or officiant first. They can help you choose a song and length of performance that is appropriate for the occasion and that will fit in with the overall flow of the service or memorial. This is a setting where making a mistake reflects poorly on not only the performer but the service in general so make sure you rehearse!

Conclusion

Thanks for reading! We hope you find this helpful. If you have suggestions or feedback, send us an email at info@in-valhalla.com.

Funeral Programs: Printing, Costs, and Options

Introduction

One of the many things that you need to prepare for a funeral or memorial service is the funeral program. The funeral program is meant to help the mourners remember the person who died. 

In this article, you will find out the different options about how you can print this important document. As you read through, you will also know where you can get the best printing services, as well as the real costs.

What Is a Funeral Program?

Envelope

funeral program is a brochure that features the details of the funeral program. The funeral program is distributed to the attendees of the funeral and it guides the mourners on what will happen throughout the service. Funeral programs are also referred to as the funeral booklet, funeral brochure, or order of service.

Aside from indicating what will happen in the funeral service, a funeral program is also printed with tributes for the deceased. Funeral programs often have photos, obituariespoems, prayers, and lyrics of songs that honor the person who died. There may be a short biography about the deceased, as well as details about the following services that will take place after the funeral. 

Funeral programs can be kept by the attendees as memorial keepsakes. With a funeral program, mourners can read through the life story of the deceased and keep it as their remembrance. 

Printing the Funeral Program

You have many options in printing the funeral programs. You can either:

  • Print the funeral programs at home
  • Print the funeral programs using a self-service copier
  • Use professional funeral printing services 

Printing the Funeral Program Yourself

Laptop and Printer

You can always print the funeral programs yourself if you have a home printer or you can go to a nearby self-service copier. This is a good option if you have the time, skills, and access to a printer. Printing the funeral program yourself would also help you save money.

Professional Printing Services

It is important to keep in mind that there are a lot of pieces that go into planning a funeral on top of the grieving. Funerals come together immediately after the passing of a loved one, so there is always a time crunch. In addition to the other things that you need to prepare for a funeral arrangement, printing the funeral program could take too much time and effort. We understand that losing a loved one can be overwhelming, so it can make sense to delegate this kind of task to a professional. 

In this case, the best option is to use printing services for a funeral program. When you use printing services, you just simply have to give them the information about the funeral and they can design and print it for you within a short time. You can also send them your own template, in case you are fond of designing the funeral program yourself.

Why Use Printing Services?

In taking advantage of printing services for funeral programs, you avoid stressing yourself about the design, plus the necessary layouts, sizes, types of paper, ink, and printer.

Getting the help of a professional ensures the program will do what it’s meant to: act as a physical memorial for attendants to appreciate at the services and take home with them.

Where to Get Funeral Printing Services

Many professional printing services operate online. Some of them specialize in funeral programs. These funeral printing services are experienced creating, printing, and delivering funeral programs on a quick timeline. 

If you cannot design the funeral program yourself, many online printing services also offer both design and printing services. They make sure that each funeral program is expertly designed and completed within a fast turn-around time. Above all, professional printing services make sure that you receive high-quality funeral brochures. 

Below are some of the best funeral printing services you can take advantage of online:

  • Fast Funeral Printing
  • Vistaprint
  • Funeral Prints

Fast Funeral Printing

Fast Funeral Printing is focused, as the name would suggest, exclusively on funeral printing services. This company is aware of the high funeral costs that families have to bear, so they make sure that their funeral programs are affordable. The cost for the funeral program template and the cost for printing is condensed into one price. Fast Funeral Printing also prints funeral bookmarks, guestbooks, prayer cards, and cards.

To place an order, you simply need to:

  • Choose your preferred theme for your loved one’s funeral program. 
  • Input the required details about your loved one. Their website has samples to help you organize the information in the funeral program template.
  • Check out and pay for the funeral product. Within 24 hours from the time of your order, Fast Funeral Printing will ship the funeral program to your address. 

Vistaprint

Vistaprint offers professional-looking funeral and memorial invitations. They have different design options for you to choose from. After selecting your favorite template, you can then customize the photos, message, and even the font for the front and back sides. 

If you prepare your own design for the funeral program, Vistaprint also prints your own design template. If you need help from a professional to design the program according to your taste, you can take advantage of their design services where they can custom design a funeral program for an additional fee. 

Vistaprint makes sure your funeral invitations arrive within three business days. They also print internationally.

Vistaprint offers many other products for different occasions such as holiday cards, wedding invitations, business cards, stationery, and many more. 

Funeral Prints

Funeral Prints is a company specializing in printed funeral products. They offer an extensive selection of funeral program designs that are available in 4-page or 8-page templates. The templates feature different layouts and backgrounds that let you add photos of the deceased, an obituary, funeral readings, poems, and lyrics to funeral songs. 

Each design is fully customizable. In case you need a certain theme, the funeral program can be customized according to different religions, landscapes, and background. 

You can expect that the funeral program looks high-quality because it is printed on a gloss text paper. The design for the funeral program from Funeral Prints is 8.5 x 5.5 inches.

In case you need the funeral programs immediately, if you place your order before 3 PM EST, so it can be mailed to you on the same day. 

How Much Does It Cost to Print Funeral Programs?

A four-page funeral program (half-fold) with a size of 8.5 x 11 inches costs around $75 to $145 for 50 copies. 

For eight-page funeral programs with the same size and quantity, it ranges from $200 to $245. 

These costs are from online funeral printing companies that offer both the design and print services for a funeral program.

You might be thinking whether it would be cheaper if you just buy a funeral program template and print it yourself at home than using professional printing services. That is the common assumption. However, using funeral printing services can actually save you more money. 

According to Fast Funeral Printing, using printing services for funeral programs can help you save as much as $60. Here’s how they explained it:

For instance, the standard funeral template is $40.00, and let’s say you need 100 programs and have a typical laser printer. The average ink cartridge is $10 per color and will print 325 pages at 5% ink coverage, but the average template is designed with 50% ink coverage, reducing your yield to just 32 pages per ink cartridge set. 

So in a typical situation, your ink would cost you 3 sets of ink, or $120.00 total, not including what it costs to go buy the cartridges, let’s say $5.00 plus the paper you need (another $5.00). 

So your total cost is around $170.00. The fastfuneralprinting.com price is 98.00 + shipping, that’s a $60.00 savings.”

Each company prices their funeral programs differently. Don’t forget to factor in the shipping fees depending on your location.

Things to Consider When Printing Funeral Programs

Regardless of where you finally decide to print your funeral programs, you have to take note of some considerations first:

  1. Choose the format. Funeral programs can be printed into different numbers of pages and fold. It can be a single sheet flyer, bi-fold, tri-fold, et cetera. Choose a funeral program with more pages if you want to add more photos and text. 
  2. Decide on the type of paper. Whether you will print it yourself or avail of professional printing services, you can choose which type of paper to use for your funeral program. Some printing companies let you choose between glossy or matte paper. 
  3. Carefully select what you will add to the funeral program. Aside from the details about the funeral service itself, the funeral program can feature photos of the deceased, an obituary, quotes, Bible passages, poems, readings, prayers, and many more. A funeral program may have a limited space depending on the format and template that you will choose. Try to decide with your family about what you think would be best to add to the funeral program of your loved one. 

FAQ

Where can I print a funeral program?

You can print a funeral program by yourself using a home printer, through a local copy shop, or professional printing services. It is the best option to choose funeral printing services because they offer design templates and printing in one. Printing services also save you a lot of time. Instead of stressing about designing and printing the funeral programs yourself, you can just let the professionals handle the project. Many printing companies ship out the funeral programs within the same day after you place the order.

How much does it cost to print funeral programs?

A four-page funeral program (half-fold) with a size of 8.5 x 11 inches costs around $75 to $145 for 50 pieces. For eight-page funeral programs with the same size and quantity, it ranges from $200 to $245. 

What is the standard size for a funeral program?

Funeral programs are usually printed on an 8.5 x 11 sheet of paper and then folded in half. The final funeral program would then become a four-page brochure with a size of 8.5 x 5.5 inches after being folded. 

What kind of paper is used for funeral programs?

Funeral programs are usually printed on thick glossy paper. This type of paper will make an excellent opaque base with rich colors when printed. The standard weight of the paper used in funeral programs is 100#. 

Conclusion

Thanks for reading! We hope you find this helpful. If you have suggestions or feedback, send us an email at info@in-valhalla.com.

Men’s Funeral Attire (With Outfits)

Introduction

Choosing what to wear at a funeral attire can be stressful. This is especially true for men who feel like they do not have anything prepared for the occasion. Also, it is not like you go to funerals all the time for you to be well aware of what to wear during the service.

There is no need to worry. You probably have something in your closet that you can wear at a funeral service. You just have to know what to look for, and you will surely have a prepared men’s funeral outfit.  

Below are some tips and guidelines on how to dress in a men’s funeral attire. The pointers on what to wear are divided according to the season and service to attend. 

What Should Men Wear to a Funeral?

Black Suit Hanging On Wall

Short Answer: The proper funeral attire for men is usually a suit. It could also be an outfit that resembles a business professional look. It can be a white dress shirt paired with a dark tie to match, and a nice pair of slacks. The outfit must also be clean and wrinkle-free. 

A suit is the expected outfit choice at a funeral service, which is why every man is usually expected to have at least one dark suit in hand in case it is needed for a funeral or memorial service.

However, this dress idea has always been traditional. Now, it is acceptable to wear even business casual attire. It is enough to wear slacks with a collared shirt. 

Tip: It is better to wear a traditional men’s funeral attire than to be underdressed.

Outfits

You want funeral attire with outfits, so here are some outfits:

  • Classic: Black shirt, (optional) black sport coat, black plants (optional black tie)
  • Classic Alternative: White shirt, (optional) black sport coat, black tie, black pants
  • Classic Informal: Black shirt, black pants
  • Contemporary: Black turtleneck, black pants

Navy is also an acceptable alternative, as are darker gray pants for black pants.

Bow ties are not appropriate for funerals, even if they is black.

Things To Consider

Before choosing an outfit, there are a few things to think about first. To help narrow down your choices and give you a better idea of how to dress for the funeral service, consider the following:

Relationship with the deceased. Think about the person who died. Expectedly, you will dress more formally if you are close to the deceased. If you were close to the person who died, you do not have to dress as formally. In any case, you cannot wear casual attire.

  • If it is a close family member, you must dress respectfully since all eyes will probably be on you.
  • For friends and extended family, you do not have to wear an all-black outfit. You can wear dark colors such as navy blue and gray. 
  • If the deceased is an acquaintance, wear something practical. Look for outfits that you already own and make it work as something suitable for a funeral. Even if you are not close to the deceased, you should still take note of the funeral etiquette. Meaning, you can wear bright colors.

Black isn’t always required. Although wearing black funeral attire for males is traditional, outfit choices are not limited to that color alone. Here are some colors that you can wear at a funeral aside from black:

  • Dark and light shades of gray
  • Navy blue
  • Brown
  • Earth colors
  • Violet
  • White

Avoid bright colors such as yellow, red, and orange.

Man Wearing Blue Suit

Men’s Funeral Attire for Different Services

Because there are different types of services—such as awake, graveyard service, or memorial service—it stands to reason there might be different dress codes for each service. However, that’s not necessarily the case. Generally, you can wear what you would normally wear to a funeral for the other types of services

Man Wearing Black Suit

However, you still have the option to dress more casually depending on the gathering. It is important to know the best attire for each of these services. Below are some of the differences:

Wake

A wake is a social gathering that takes place before or shortly after the person’s death. A wake traditionally takes place at the home of the deceased with their body present, but it can also be held at a funeral home. This gathering is where people close to the person who died gets the chance to celebrate the life of the deceased as they share memories and say goodbye.

For a wake service, men are advised to wear the same dark suit that they would wear at a funeral service. Simply follow the guidelines about what to wear for funerals. 

The expectation of what to wear is along the lines of formal to business-casual attire. When in doubt, just lean on wearing more formal attire. 

For an outfit idea, you can wear a:

  • Black suit
  • Suit with dark colors
  • Black Sweater

Memorial Service

memorial service is different from a funeral. A funeral service is the ceremony wherein the body is present and placed in a casket. In contrast, a memorial service is a gathering of mourners without the body present. Often the memorial service takes place after the body has been buried or cremated. For example, after Covid, many families hosted memorials months or years after the passing of the loved one, when health restrictions allowed for larger gatherings.

For a memorial service attire, you can dress less formally than you would in a funeral. You should still observe the appropriate dress code such as wearing dark colors, but you can wear something more casual and informal than a suit. Make sure that it is still respectful and conservative. 

Think what you would wear to a job interview or a church service, but with subdued colors. 

An outfit idea for a memorial service would be:

  • Dress pants
  • White, collared Shirt
  • Black Necktie

Graveside Service

The graveside service is also known as the committal service, burial service, graveside ceremony, or simply a burial. The graveside service usually takes place right after the funeral, so the attire for both services are identical.

For a graveside service, make sure to wear comfortable shoes. There is going to be a lot of walking and standing during a graveside ceremony, so you must be prepared to wear an attire that brings comfort more than style. 

What to Wear If You Don’t Have a Suit

Man Wearing Blue Blazer and White Dress Shirt

If you do not own a traditional funeral attire, you do not need to panic. There are many alternative appropriate men’s funeral outfits that you can wear if you do not have a suit. Here are some of your options.

  • Sport coat or blazer. This is a good alternative for a suit. You just have to pair it with a white dress shirt, dark necktie, and a nice pair of pants. It would be most appropriate if the sport coat and trousers are in dark colors such as black, gray, or navy blue. Wear dressy shoes that are in dark color as well.
  • Button-down shirt and necktie. If you do not have a sport coat, you can just wear a button-down shirt. Make sure that your dress shirt and necktie are in dark colors. It would be better to wear a long-sleeve dress shirt than one with short sleeves. 
  • Dark sweater and dress pants. A sweater or turtleneck is another alternative if you do not have any of the first two outfits ideas mentioned. Your sweater must be dark-toned. Pair it with dark pants and shoes. If the weather is cold, you can layer a sweater over a button-down shirt and necktie. 

Men’s Funeral Attire According to Season

You must always consider the weather and the location of the funeral, memorial service, wake, or burial.

Summer

If you will be attending a funeral service in the summer, take note of where it will be held. In case the funeral will be outdoors, you must be prepared for the heat. Here are some tips for a summer funeral:

  • Do not add too many layers to your outfit. As much as possible, keep your outfit lightweight. You do not want to wear thick layers of clothing under the scorching sun.
  • Choose light and airy fabrics. If you have other choices that are made of lighter fabrics such as linen and cotton, opt for that. Avoid fabrics such as nylon, polyester, or other synthetic fabrics because they are uncomfortable to wear in the heat.  
  • Bring sun-protective items such as umbrellas and sunglasses. The sunglasses can be simple and black. For umbrellas, a black one is preferred.
  • Dress conservatively. Even if the funeral is in the summer, you are still not supposed to wear shorts, denim, and flip flops. Just wear something lightweight. You can wear a dark polo shirt. For shoes, loafers, dark sneakers, and dress shoes can be acceptable, as long as it is worn with dark socks. 

Winter

Man Wearing Coat

For the cold season, the same dress code applies for men. You are still expected to wear a suit but you can add a few more clothing items. Just make sure that they are still appropriate as men’s funeral attire.

  • Wear a coat. You can wear a thick coat over your standard men’s funeral outfit. If possible—and this is one of the easiest places to feel like you’ve made a mistake—make sure your coat is not brightly colored. A black wool coat would go well for men’s funeral attire in the winter.
  • Wear accessories. You can wear accessories that help against cold temperatures such as gloves, scarves, and hats. Just make sure that they are in dark colors. Bring a black umbrella as well. 
  • Wear black rain boots for outdoor services. For services held outdoors such as the burial, you can wear rain boots. For the indoor service, you can just wear your usual winter footwear. 

In the Rain

In case you are expecting it to rain and the service will be held outdoors, you must be prepared to dress appropriately

  • Wear a coat with rain-resistant fabric. This will help in avoiding the wetness to seep into your outfit beneath the coat. 
  • Wear dark rain boots. You have to wear appropriate shoes. If you will be attending a burial service, the grounds of the cemetery may be damp. 
  • Bring an umbrella. This is a standard to protect yourself from the rain. You may also wear a hat, such as a fedora, to further avoid wetness. 

Funeral Attire for Boys

For younger boys, make sure to dress in something comfortable. Dark funeral attire is still appropriate for children, but it is not necessarily required. 

  • Make sure not to dress them with attention-catching outfits. Keep their funeral outfit understated and conservative. 
  • Shoes and socks are also better if it’s in dark colors. Ensure that the shoes are clean and do not look too worn out. 

FAQ

What should men wear to a funeral?

Men’s funeral attire generally involves a suit or an outfit that resembles a business professional look. It can be a white dress shirt paired with a dark tie to match, and a nice pair of slacks. The outfit must also be clean and wrinkle-free. Wear conservative clothing in dark and neutral colors like black, gray, and navy blue. Avoid bright colors.

What do you wear to a wake?

For men, you can wear the same dark suit that you would normally wear at a funeral service. Black sweaters and turtlenecks are other other alternatives.

What do you wear to a memorial service?

Men can wear more casually in a memorial service than in a funeral. In this case, you can skip wearing a suit and opt for a dress shirt and a nice pair of pants. However, remember that you must still dress modestly, and you must dress in a dark and conservative outfit.

What do you wear to a graveside service?

The graveside service usually takes place right after the funeral, so the attire for both services are just the same. However, make sure that you wear comfortable shoes during a graveside service because it usually involves a lot of walking and standing during the ceremony. 

What do you wear to a funeral during the summer?

You can wear something identical to a proper funeral attire but you can lessen the layers and keep the outfit lightweight. As much as possible, choose clothing that is made of light and airy fabrics. Prepare an umbrella and a pair of sunglasses as well.

What do you wear to a funeral during the winter?

You can wear the same funeral attire that you would normally wear but you can add a black coat and some accessories to keep you warm such as gloves, scarves, and hats. Make sure that your accessories are in dark colors as well.

Is wearing black required at funerals?

No. You are not required to wear black to a funeral. Other dark and neutral colors are acceptable such as gray, navy blue, and dark brown. 

Conclusion

Thanks for reading! We hope you find this helpful. If you have suggestions or feedback, send us an email at info@in-valhalla.com.

Memorial Diamonds Complete Guide – Ashes to Diamonds

Introduction

Your loved one has been cremated, the ashes are yours…now what? Putting them in an urn doesn’t appeal, scattering them to the wind isn’t enough…but can you really turn ashes into diamonds? Yes—the process of creating a memorial diamond(s) has been a meaningful part of the grieving process and produced beautiful keepsake for countless families.

How Do You Turn Ashes to Diamonds?

After cremation, the family is left with the ashes (cremains). You may choose to scatter them, keep them in an urn, or find an alternative way to memorialize your loved one. Having a cremation diamond made from the ashes is one such alternative that has been gaining popularity in the last few years.

Originally discovered in the 1950s and 1960s, this process has been used to create cremation diamonds since the early 2000s. In 2003, LifeGem claims to be the first to offer the service to consumers (with their 2001 patent), with Heart In Diamond making the same claim with this Russian patent. Algordanza in Switzerland was also close behind.

So how do you transform ashes into diamonds?

  1. Carbon is extracted from the ashes and purified, converting it to graphite (a form of carbon).
  2. The carbon is subject to the same conditions that create real diamonds in an HPHT (high pressure and high temperature) machine. Adding color is an option at this step.
  3. The rough diamond is removed and cleaned.
  4. The clean rough diamond is (optionally) cut and polished.
  5. The cremation diamond may be engraved with a laser.
  6. The memorial diamond will be graded and issued a certificate.
  7. The newly created diamond can be set or mounted in jewelry.

It can take anywhere from 50 days to 1 year for a company to create cremation diamonds from human ashes. Generally they require 0.5 to 2 grams of hair or 100 grams of ashes to complete the process.

All HPHT diamonds are authentic, real diamonds—including those made from human ashes. However, they are distinguishable. According to the GIA (Gemological Institute of America), the difference between natural and HPHT-created diamonds “can be detected only at knowledgeable, experienced, fully-equipped gemological laboratories.”

Although we focus on Algordanza in our explanations, it is only because they provide the most detail about their process and the most complete information. We consider all companies offering this service in our reviews (and only recommend Algordanza in certain circumstances).

Step 1: Purifying Carbon

Diamonds are made from carbon, so to create memorial diamonds one must first extract the carbon. While hair is about 45% carbon (according to this study), ashes range from about 0.5% to 2.5% carbon by dry mass. Hair is a useful alternative if you don’t plan to cremate your loved one for religious, cultural, or any other reason—or would prefer to keep the ashes in addition to the diamond.

Some companies (including Algordanza) allow you to use the ashes of other symbolic carbon sources if you don’t have enough ashes. These can include letters, diaries, or pictures.

First, the amorphous carbon in the ashes is purified. This just means everything else (other elements and minerals) is removed. Most often, this is done by heating the ashes to extremely high temperatures. It is then refined into graphite, which changes the unstructured, amorphous carbon and charcoal into a neat, ordered allotrope, as pictured below. To get it all the way to diamond structure, however, takes even more extreme conditions…

Only about 3%-5% of the carbon diamond is actually from your loved one. And that number may be far lower, as it is hypothesized carbon is lost in the step from amorphorous carbon to graphite. Companies do not provide the specific number (except for Algordanza).

Step 2: Growing the Diamond

The carbon from the ashes is placed inside a growing cell, which in turn is placed inside a high temperature and high pressure (HPHT) machine.

The growing cell contains, in addition to the graphite carbon, “a catalyst of mixed metals and powders that facilitates the diamond growth” (Source).

HPHT machines can generate temperatures from 1,400 to 2,600 degrees Celsius and pressures of 50,000 to 60,000 atmospheres (870,000 PSI), much like what real diamonds experience in Earth’s crust. 1 atmosphere is the pressure of air at sea level. At the bottom of the Mariana Trench, it’s about 1,100 atmospheres—so it takes a lot of energy to turn graphite into diamond.

HPHT (High Pressure High Temperature) Machines of Algordanza
Three HPHT machines in Algordanza’s labs.

After weeks to months in these conditions, the carbon melts and reshapes itself into diamond. The cooling process is carefully controlled to improve the quality of the memorial diamond.

Alternative HPHT machine
Another example of an HPHT machine. Here it is more obvious how pressure is applied: the big metal presses squeeze the sphere in the middle.

Color can be modified during the process. In fact, this method is the only way to permanently change the blueness and yellowness of a diamond. You can use this same process to change the color of naturally formed diamonds as well, or any pre-existing diamond (natural or lab grown). We’ll talk more about coloration later.

HPHT machines are also used for commercial diamonds because it’s a fast and cheap way to turn flawed, natural diamonds into much higher quality ones—or make them from scratch, like cremation diamonds.

As you might expect, the use of HPHT machines in the diamond industry was met with both joy and dismay. In order to determine whether diamonds were natural or synthetic, the Gemological Institute of America (GIA) tasked Dr. Wuyi Wang and his team. They created DiamondView, which uses spectroscopic techniques like considering the grain of the diamond. Now, all diamond certifications (and yes, diamonds get certifications—we’ll get to that later in this article) identify if the diamond as natural or synthetic.

Lab Grown Diamond Certificate
Source: GIA’s Guide to the 4C’s

Step 3: Rough Diamond Cleaning

After the diamond has undergone its primordial experience in the HPHT machine, it is considered a rough diamond. A rough diamond is any diamond that hasn’t yet been cut.

The diamond is carefully removed from the growing cell and cleaned in an acid bath.

Rough Diamond in growth cell after HPHT machine
The growth cell is broken to reveal the rough diamond inside. Source: My Memorial Diamond.

Step 4: Cutting and Polishing

After the diamonds are removed, they are cut and polished. You may have a say in how it is cut, or, if you would prefer, you could leave it in its natural form. The choice is yours.

Most companies will provide a list of options regarding the cut shape. Their selections will look something like the following image.

Different Diamond Cuts and Options
Source: Love & Pieces

Step 5: Laser Engraving

Most companies will also offer laser engraving that may include useful information about the diamond. Some even offer an optional personalized message. For example, Algordanza will include their signet and the unique reference number of the order, plus optional custom text.

Diamond laser engravings can be viewed at about 30 times magnification. Its message will be part of the diamonds certification.

Algordanza Diamond Laser Engraving
An engraving of an Algordanza cremation diamond with their signet and a reference number.

Step 6: Certification

The Gemological Institute of America (GIA) has standardized certification, allowing experts to appraise the size, color, quality, weight, and cut of any diamond. Weight (really mass) is measured in carats, which are equivalent to 0.200 grams. These qualities are generally referred to as the 4Cs, for the color scale, clarity scale, carat weight, and cut scale.

GIA Diamond certification all scales 4cs

The AGS (American Gem Society) is another well-respected certifier.

Cremation Diamond GIA Certification

Step 7: Setting

Of course, this last step is completely optional. It can be done later at a local jeweler, or reset if you prefer it in a different piece of jewelry.

What Do You Need to Know About Memorial Diamonds?

There are a few important factors to review before we get to how much memorial diamonds cost and where to buy them. They are coloration, timeframe, and carat size. Also, we’ll discuss the religious stance on transforming ashes to diamonds and the environmental and economic impacts of lab grown diamonds.

Diamond Colors

The coloration of the diamond comes from impurities in the carbon. For example, the element boron contributes to the blue tone of a diamond. The element nitrogen creates a yellowish tint. Logically, a perfectly pure diamond would be colorless and completely clear.

Modifying the colors of a diamond is possible because the the relationship of blue and yellow to boron and nitrogen. The catalyst, during this growth process, binds some combination of boron and nitrogen. By changing the catalyst, you can control how much boron and nitrogen is included in the final diamond.

Green, red, pink and other more exotic colors can be added to the diamond after its formation via irradiation. Red diamonds are created from a partial breakdown in the lattice network of the diamond, achieved by bombarding a diamond with electron-radiation in the form of beta particles. When used on diamonds, gamma radiation (which is just high-energy light), creates a green color. Diamonds with so many impurities and inclusions in them light is no longer reflected appear black. (Thanks to Algordanza for the correction!)

Diamond GIA Color Scale and Rarity
Source: Accredited Gemological Institute of New York City

What Are Diamond Sizes?

Diamond sizes are determined by how big the diamond is, as measured by weight (mass) in carats. One carat is equal to 0.200 grams.

Diamond Carat Sizes Guide
From the 20th century catalogue of supplies for watchmakers, jewelers and kindred trades, page 655 (1899)
Cremation Diamond Size Chart

Religion and Cremation Diamonds

Many, many religions accept cremation as an acceptable, if not preferred, method of honoring the body of a loved one after passing.

However, accepting cremation does not mean a religious sect accepts cremation diamonds. Most strongly, the pope condemned cremation diamonds in 2016. He also stated that the Roman Catholic church considered all forms of cremation jewelry to be sacrilegious.

This is where you can read more about religious views on cremation diamonds.

Why Are Lab Grown Diamonds Better Than Natural Diamonds?

There are three significant issues with natural diamonds. First, the impact of both exploring and extracting diamonds on the environment is substantial and wide-ranging, including erosion, destruction of ecosystems, and deforestation.

Second, the mining of diamonds is associated with horrific working conditions and child labor.

Third, some diamonds are used to finance civil wars or terrorism. Such diamonds are called blood diamonds or conflict diamonds. At an international level there has been much regulation in the last two decades to certify the origin of diamonds, primarily through the 2003 Kimberly Process. Diamonds that can be demonstrated not to have financed wars are called conflict-free diamonds.

In short, lab grown diamonds circumvent all these problems. In terms of price, until 2018, lab grown diamonds had been selling for about 30% less than natural diamonds, but since then that number has risen to 70-80% less.

How Long Does it Take to Make Memorial Diamonds?

Color plays a much larger role than most people would expect in the timeframe of creating a diamond. The image below captures the range of times for the most popular colors. The companies who offer memorial diamonds market their services as ranging from about two months to 11 months (though this is different from the amount of time the diamond is in the HPHT machine), with a lot of variety by company. The total timeframe—from purchase to delivery—is something we consider when making our recommendation.

Time to create memorial diamonds of different colors chart
Source: Lonite. The time ranges differ from Saint Diamonds (below) because of their processes and machines.
Timeframe for how long to compress diamonds to get different colors
Source: Saint Diamonds. The timeframe differs from Lonite (above) because of their processes and machines.

How Much Do Cremation Diamonds Cost?

Cremation diamond prices range from about $695 to $50,000 for 0.1 to 3 carats. Generally, yellow diamonds are the cheapest and fastest to make. Colorless diamonds, on the other hands, are the most expensive. Many companies offer payment plans and there are a variety of ways to fundraise for memorials.

Memorial diamond prices depends on five factors: the 4C’s of the diamond and the quality of the service. After picking a company, the biggest factor in price is the carat—or size—of the diamond.

  • Color
  • Clarity
  • Carat Size
  • Cut
  • Quality of customer service offered by the cremation diamond company

If memorial diamonds appeal to you or your family but are outside your price range, consider reading our guide to memorial fundraisers.

What Companies Can Turn Ashes to Diamonds?

We found seven (listed alphabetically).

Many companies allow you to create multiple diamonds throughout the process, offering discounts if you purchase more than one. This is great for children of a parent who has passed on, or the loved one’s spouse and parents.

Where Should I Buy My Cremation Diamond?

We have broken down the answer to this question into three different sets of circumstances. However, overall our ranking is as follows:

  1. Eterneva
  2. Algordanza (My Memorial Diamond in the US)
  3. Heart In Diamond
EternevaMy Memorial Diamond*Heart In Diamond*
Certification
Laser Engraving
SettingOptOpt
Pricing$$$$$
Starting At (Cost)$2,999$3,799$750
Starting At (Carat)0.1–0.190.250.03
Maximum Cost$50,000$22,299$17,295
Maximum Carat322
Opt = Optional (for an additional fee)
*We are reporting US-based prices
  • Be careful to take into account the size when comparing prices between companies. The larger the carat, the more expensive.
  • The minimum prices are for the smallest carat of yellow diamonds. The maximum price is the largest carat of colorless diamond.
  • Rough (uncut) diamonds are much cheaper
  • My Memorial Diamond offers high carat diamonds for a custom quote.

Algordanza only offers colors in clear or blue because it is the most authentic. The boron in bones, nails, and hair (from 2-50 ppm) all contribute to the bluish color of their diamonds.

Eterneva Review

Eterneva Logo

First, if your focus is on the experience, Eterneva is certainly the way to go. Their pricing is competitive, but slightly on the high side. While the timeframe is relatively long at 7–10 months, they go above and beyond to help you through the grieving process and make the experience of creating and receiving your cremation diamond extraordinary—including sending you video progress reports.

Algordanza / My Memorial Diamond Review

Algordanza Logo

Second, if you want the largest and most experienced company outside the US, Algordanza would be your best choice. They are far and away the most transparent about their process, research, and experience. Additionally, they have an international presence and are one of the largest cremation diamond service providers in the world.

If you have only hair or want to use other sources of carbon (letters, pictures, etc), Algordanza is a great choice because they offer discounts for hair (because it is easier to purify).

Heart In Diamond Review

Heart In Diamond Logo

Third, if you are on a budget or time sensitive, we recommend you choose Heart In Diamond. Their turnaround time is 70-120 days with extremely competitive prices. (Though Everdear offers the least expensive option at $695 for a 0.1 carat diamond, they take about 11 months to deliver.)

Founded in 2005, Heart In Diamond has an international presence and sterling reputation. To their detriment, certification and custom engraving is not included in the price—though it is available for an extra fee.

Can You Create Cremation Diamonds From Pets?

Yes! Saint Diamonds, Heart In Diamond, Algordanza (in collaboration with Semper Fides), and LifeGem all offer services specifically dedicated to pets, but any company can create pet memorial diamonds. After all, they cannot distinguish if the ashes came from a person or a pet.

FAQ

Does it matter how long ago the loved one was cremated?

No. Ashes do not expire. Even centuries later, theoretically you should still be able to turned ashes into diamonds.

What is a diamond carat?

A carat is a measure of the mass of a diamond (weight without gravity), where one carat is equivalent to 0.200 grams.

How much carbon (hair, ashes, other) do you need to create a memorial diamond?

Generally you need about 500 grams of ashes or 5 grams of hair. The difference exists because hair contains a lot more carbon than ashes.

Are memorial diamonds (and lab-grown diamonds in general) good for the environment?

Yes! Mining for natural diamonds is a process that destroys ecosystems, may fund wars, and enables poor working conditions. By comparison, the energy and effort that it takes to grow a diamond in a lab is much smaller. Furthermore, many companies—particularly memorial diamond service providers—have made commitments to sustainability.

Are there pet memorial Diamonds?

Yes! Saint Diamonds, Heart In Diamond, and LifeGem all offer services specifically dedicated to pets, but any company can create pet memorial diamonds.

Where should I buy my memorial diamond?

We recommend Eterneva as our top choice (in most situations). Their pricing is on the higher side, but still competitive. While the timeframe is relatively long at 7–10 months, they go above and beyond to help you through the grieving process.

How much does it cost to turn ashes into diamonds?

Memorial diamond prices range from about $695 to $50,000 for 0.1 to 3 carats. Generally, yellow diamonds are the cheapest and fastest to make. Colorless diamonds, on the other hands, are the most expensive. Many companies offer payment plans and there are a variety of ways to fundraise for memorials.

How long does it take to turn ashes into diamonds?

Color plays a much larger role than most people would expect in the timeframe of creating a diamond. Yellow is the fastest, while colorless diamonds take the longest time. Companies offering memorial diamonds, market their services as ranging from about two months to 11 months (though this is different from the amount of time the diamond is in the HPHT machine), with a lot of variety by company. Timeframe for how long to compress diamonds to get different colors

Conclusion

Thanks for reading! We hope you find this helpful. If you have suggestions or feedback, send us an email at info@in-valhalla.com.

PS Many thanks to Algordanza for helping to improve the quality and accuracy of this article!

Understanding Lawn Crypts

Introduction

Maybe you have heard the term “lawn crypt” offered as a burial option, but you are not familiar with the concept.

In this article, we will discover that lawn crypts can maximize space, will require less manual labor, and offer other benefits to you and your family. 

What Is a Lawn Crypt?

Lawn Cemetery

Lawn crypts are pre-made underground vaults made of reinforced concrete and steel for the purpose of protecting caskets. Lawn crypts keep the caskets clean and dry—and perform like an underground mausoleum. Prices begin around $1,500 and increase from there. 

The lawn crypt option strikes a balance between traditional burial and entombment in a mausoleum. They allow for the burial of a casket while being placed inside a crypt—effectively burying the crypt. More than one casket can be buried in the same vault; most often two are stacked vertically.

In a sense, lawn crypts are underground mausoleums. They are sometimes called in-ground mausoluems.

Compared with other types of burial liners, lawn crypts is more substantial and fully constructed. They are made of strong materials such as steel and concrete that prevent the ground from collapsing in case the Earth shifts or heavy equipment travels over the burial plot. 

They will requires deeper excavation than a conventional grave because a lawn crypt is twice the height of a single vault. Hence, they are also referred to as double depth graves. Lawn crypts can accommodate two caskets, making it suitable for couples who want to share the same final resting place.

An above ground lawn crypt is really just an above ground crypt. Think of it as a mausoleum, but one you cannot enter.

Advantages of Lawn Crypts

Cemetery

With lawn crypts, you avoid problems typically associated with traditional burials such as cave-ins and large boulders. And there will be no need to drill adjacent burial sites to make room for a new one. 

The lawn crypt is pre-installed, which makes the interment much easier. It will require less time for excavation and less manual labor.

Lawn crypts also maximize the available space in the cemetery because each crypt can hold two or more interments.

Clean and Dry

One key difference between traditional burials and lawn crypts is that the crypts have built-in drainage so they stay clean and dry. 

As opposed to burial, rainwater or snow that seeps through the ground will not fill up inside the crypt. The drainage prevents the build-up of water. In conventional burial, gasketed caskets are used to protect the body from environmental forces like water, but they don’t last forever.

Multiple Burials

In addition to double depth sizes, some lawn crypts are large enough to hold 6 to 12 caskets. This is a practical choice for families who want to be interred in the same burial plot.

While lawn crypts usually hold couples and family members, they can also be shared among strangers. The shared cost makes an economical choice.

Lawn crypts with multiple depths became popular among high-density areas where people do not resist the interment of caskets one over the other. One downside of lawn crypts is that interments are listed on a common marker placed on top of the crypt. Double headstones pair well with lawn crypts so that multiple names can be displayed.

If a family chooses a lawn crypt, they may need to waive the possibility of disinterment in the future, since doing so will be extremely difficult.

How Are Lawn Crypts Installed & Constructed?

Lawn crypts are pre-installed at a burial plot before any interment. 

Construction starts with the cemetery excavating several sections that are deeper than a normal grave. They then install infrastructure to provide drainage that keeps the burial site dry.

After this, they install the lawn crypts either side by side or in multiple depths and then backfill it with gravel and dirt. 

The crypts remain buried under the ground covered with soil and turf until an interment takes place.

When a casket is interred, the cemetery staff will remove the turf and soil on top of the crypt to expose the lid and then lift it to lower the casket. After the burial, the soil and turf are replaced.

How Much Does a Lawn Crypt Cost?

The price for lawn crypt ranges from $1,500 to $12,000 or more. The actual cost will depend on the capacity of the lawn crypt and the location of the burial plot.

The lawn crypt price usually includes the cost of the burial (land). In this case, you won’t need to worry about paying more money since you are essentially getting a grave space and a vault in one purchase.

Considerations When Buying

Before buying a lawn crypt, inquire about what’s included in the cost. Ask whether the burial plot and interment fees are already included in the quoted price. 

Also, ask about any restrictions from the cemetery regarding headstones and flowers. Check with the staff regarding perpetual care and whether the fees are recurring or one-time only. 

How the Need for Lawn Crypts Evolved

Full ledger grave on a Lawn

Cemeteries started to consider using a lawn crypt because they save and maximize available burial space. They are also practical because they can withstand different climate and soil conditions such as flooding and soil erosion. Another benefit was that it eliminated the need to use a separate grave liner or burial vault.

At first, cemetery owners were hesitant about to offer lawn crypts because they require a large amount of capital expense upfront. It also increased pressure to sell the gravesites on a pre-need basis.

In the long run, lawn crypts are proven to be practical and economical options not just for the cemetery owners, but for families as well.

FAQ

What is a lawn crypt?

A lawn crypt is an underground vault made of reinforced concrete and steel. It is pre-installed in cemeteries, so it requires less time and manual labor than traditional burials during interment.

Are lawn crypts safe?

Yes. Lawn crypts are solidly constructed to withstand difficult weather and soil condition such as flooding and soil erosion.

How much is a lawn crypt?

The costs range from $1,500 to $12,000 or more, depending on the capacity of the lawn crypt and the location of the burial plot. The advantage of opting for lawn crypts is that you’re essentially getting a grave space and vault in a single purchase.

How do lawn crypts work?

Lawn crypts are pre-installed in the ground and will remain there prior to any interment. During burial, the lid will simply be lifted and then the casket is lowered. After the interment, the crypt will be closed and then soil and turf will cover the surface area.

How much space does a lawn crypt take?

It depends on the capacity of the crypt, but lawn crypts take wider and deeper spaces than traditional burial plots because one can hold two or more caskets. Usually, lawn crypts are constructed as double depth and can house two caskets.

Can I be buried with my family in a lawn crypt?

Yes. Lawn crypts are suitable for couples and families because they hold multiple interments in a single burial plot. If you want to inter two or more persons in one lawn crypt, speak directly with the cemetery about what they can offer.

Conclusion

Thanks for reading! We hope you find this helpful. If you have suggestions or feedback, send us an email at info@in-valhalla.com.

Cremation Caskets – Complete Guide

Introduction

If you’re wondering, “Why is a casket needed when it’s going to be cremated?“, we have the answer for you.

We will cover the options: cremation container, rental casket, or traditional burial casket. You’ll learn the most affordable method and how to make the best choice.

Note: In this article, we use the word “casket” and “coffin” interchangeably. To find out how their meanings differ, you can read this comprehensive article

What Is A Cremation Casket?

A cremation casket is simply the vessel used to cremate a body.

While a traditional burial casket is an option for cremation, it is not required. All that is required is a cremation container.

Cremation Container

A cremation container does not have to be a casket with pillows, velvet interiors, and lacquered finishes. The three major requirements for a cremation container are to be combustible, non-toxic, and enclosed.

The container must be rigid, leak-proof, enclosed, and combustible. There is no need for a elaborate interior or decorations.

In lieu of a rigid container, another option is to use a burial shroud. A burial shroud is simply a blanket-like wrapping to enclose the body.

If you wish to cremate a loved one in a traditional casket with full interiors and elegant finishes, you’re free to do so. You just have to make sure the casket you’ve chosen is combustible and has minimal metal parts. Before you buy, ask if the casket is suitable for cremation (no metal screws, for example).

In conclusion, cremation caskets, shrouds, and containers must enclose the body and be made of combustible materials. Common materials include cardboard, pine, bamboo, cloth, or hardwood.

Why Do I Need A Casket For Cremation?

willow casket in crematory
Source: A Greener Funeral

As stated before, the minimum requirements for cremation is a container that is combustible and enclosed.

This is because the operators need to move the body around the crematorium. They also need to protect themselves for health and safety reasons. Most importantly, having a way to carry the body allows for the dignified handling of the deceased.

So yes, cremation caskets and containers will do. But you don’t need a casket. Burial shrouds are also effective alternatives.

Casket Options For Cremation

There are a many options for cremation caskets and containers. Factors to consider include:

  • Budget
  • Viewing, Visitation, or Wake
  • Personalization
  • Preference

Listed below are a few of the most popular cremation choices.

Cardboard Container

carboard cremation container
Source: Affordable Cremation & Burial

The least expensive option for a cremation casket is a cardboard container. This is the minimum alternative to a casket.

It is highly combustible material and low-cost. Further, it has no interiors and is very plain in design. Because of this, cardboard containers are usually not suitable for viewing. They are ideal for cremations only.

  • Extremely Low Cost
  • Extremely Accessible
  • Not Suitable for Viewing

Pine Casket

pine casket in the grass
Source: Oregon Wood Caskets LLC

Pine box caskets are typically used in green burials but are still ideal for cremation. In addition, this casket usually has no metal pieces.

Aside from meeting all the minimum requirements for a cremation container, a pine casket is fairly inexpensive in contrast to other casket types. It also can work for viewings.

  • Low to Medium Cost
  • Can be Suitable for Viewing

Wicker Casket

bamboo cremation casket
Source: Passages International

Bamboo and other wicker caskets are eco-friendly and biodegradable alternatives to traditional burial caskets. They are also ideal for cremations.

The simple and natural finish of a bamboo casket makes it suitable for viewings. Bamboo and willow caskets are presentable for visitations or a wake before the cremation.

  • Low to Medium Cost
  • Suitable for Viewing

Cloth-Covered Casket

Source: McMahon Funeral Home

Cloth-covered caskets make good cremation caskets because of their combustible materials. Underneath the cloth covering, they can be made of corrugated fiberboards, pressed wood, or cardboard.

Some cloth covered caskets—such as the handles in the picture above—are made of steel. Ask if your choice can be used for cremation before you buy.

The finish of this casket looks sophisticated because of its interiors and patterned covers. For an extremely affordable price, you can have a casket available in various colors and designs.

  • Low to Medium Cost
  • Suitable for Viewing

Traditional Wooden Casket

Hardwood Poplar Casket
Source: Titan Caskets

A traditional burial casket with fine linings, elegant finishes, and full interiors can also be a used as a cremation casket. They must be wooden and must have little to no metal pieces. Ask before you buy if it is suitable for cremation.

This type of casket is ideal for families who want to hold funeral ceremonies for their deceased loved ones. It’s also fit for those who want the beautiful coffins to be cremated with the bodies.

  • Medium to High Cost
  • Ideal for Viewing

Rental Casket For Cremation

oakwood ceremonial rental casket
Source: Starmark Cremation Products

You can also rent caskets if you want to arrange a funeral service prior to the cremation. Rental caskets are usually beautiful coffins with ornate designs. Because of this, they are best for viewings and ceremonies.

  • Low to Medium Cost
  • Ideal for Viewing

Rental options require a separate cremation container because, of course, the rental casket is not cremated. Often this is a simple cardboard option, commonly included in the price of the rental.

How Renting A Casket Works

oakwood ceremonial rental casket with insert
Source: Starmark Cremation Products

A rental casket has a removable inner container or liner. This is what holds the body and keeps it separate from the rental casket. After the service, they will remove the inner container and then transfer it to the crematorium. What will be left is the “outer shell,” or the rental casket itself, which can be reused multiple times.

Rental caskets are great for individuals looking to plan a large funeral on a small budget. In addition, rental caskets are environmentally-friendly as well. There is no need to cremate or bury a new casket; just the removable container.

How Much Is a Cremation Casket?

The National Funeral Directors Association (NFDA) offers helpful data on the average costs for cremation caskets in 2019:

TypeAverage Cost
Cremation Casket$1200
Rental Casket$995
Cremation Container$150
Source: NFDA General Price List Survey (2019)

Of course, the actual cost will still vary depending on preferences and added options. Where you will buy or rent the cremation casket can also affect the final price.

Trivia: In 2019, the national average cost of a funeral with viewing and cremation was $5,150. The cost of the cremation casket is not yet added to this figure. You can read more about the NFDA statistics report.

Where Do I Purchase a Casket for Cremation?

Cremation caskets and containers are available in a wide variety of types and materials. Similarly, there is also a wide range of casket sellers that you can choose from.

Funeral Home

Source: Zehender Robinson Stormer Cookson Funeral Home

Your funeral provider can arrange a cremation casket for you. Many funeral homes offer rental services, and almost all have an inexpensive cremation container option (normally cardboard).

Open a dialogue with your local funeral director. Inform yourself and those making the decisions. We recommend asking for a general price list (which includes all the casket options offered by the funeral home, which is required by the Funeral Law), and ask specifically for each of the options described above.

The type of casket that you choose should reflect personal preference. In a difficult time to make decisions, you want to avoid being influenced by any one salesperson or persuaded to make choices for the wrong reason. Whether you settle on the finest mahogany or opt for a basic cardboard box, just remember there is no right answer—this is a personal choice. It’s your call.

Independent Casket Retailers

casket showrom
Source: ABC Caskets Factory

In addition to buying direct from the funeral home, you can also purchase a cremation casket from an independent retailer. First, check if there is a casket shop in your area. After you find one, browse through their available cremation caskets and see if they have a competitive selection compared to your funeral home.

Online Casket Sellers

If you don’t want to buy from a funeral home or there is no independent casket seller near you, the next option is to shop online.

Online casket sellers can offer the same top quality caskets you can buy in funeral homes. And most likely at significantly lower prices.

If you’re planning to arrange a funeral service before the cremation, make sure to check if the online retailers offer rentals. You can save a lot of money while still ensuring that you have a presentable coffin for your loved one during the ceremony.

Tip: You can always buy a casket outside of your funeral home. The Federal Trade Commission requires your funeral provider to accept it and cannot charge you any fees for doing so. They also cannot require you to be present upon the delivery of the casket to the funeral home.

FAQ

What type of caskets are used for a cremation?

Virtually any type of casket (or coffin) that is combustible and non-toxic. At the very least, you can use a burial shroud or cardboard container that is covered and combustible⁠. Other options include pine box caskets, wicker caskets, and traditional hardwood caskets. You can even rent one from a funeral home.

Why do I need a casket for cremation?

In a practical sense, a casket, or at least a container, is needed to transport the body in a hearse. It is also used to move the deceased around the crematorium easily and safely. Lastly, it maintains dignity in handling the deceased. (Burial shrouds are a casket-alternative, a blanket-like wrapping for the body.)

Can I be cremated without a casket?

If you’re referring to a traditional burial coffin, then yes, you can be buried without a casket. Instead, you can be cremated in a burial shroud or cremation container. A cremation container is something rigid, covered, leak-proof, and combustible—like a simple cardboard box. A burial shrouds is a sheet that wraps around the body, sometimes with handles. Take note that the body must be enclosed when cremated.

What happens to the casket during cremation?

The casket, regardless if it’s wood or cardboard, combusts completely during cremation. Because of this, what’s left will just be the bone fragments of the deceased (and sometimes other inorganic materials that did not burn up completely).

Can I put something with the body for cremation?

It depends. Some crematoriums will allow this. But in most cases, they will not. For safety reasons, they will have to remove all items that may damage the equipment. These include batteries, sealed liquids, glass, and metal objects.
If you leave any personal items such as jewelry or watches, they will be removed and returned to you before cremation. It is best to talk to your funeral director if you wish to leave something for the cremation.

What is the cheapest casket for cremation?

The cheapest option for a cremation casket is a cardboard container. It meets all the minimum requirements for a container and is low-cost compared to all other types of caskets.

Are bodies cremated with or without clothes?

Bodies may be cremated wearing clothes. The clothes will be cremated as well, of course. This is completely optional, and often the loved one will be cremated in the clothes they were wearing when they passed away.

Can you cremate an amputated limb?

The answer is no. This article by Simon Marlow provides a thorough explanation as to why, but that short answer is that crematoriums are not permitted to cremate any tissue or limb from a currently living organism.

Conclusion

Thanks for reading! We hope you find this helpful. If you have suggestions or feedback, send us an email at info@in-valhalla.com.

Best Funeral Poems

Introduction

Grief and stress can be overwhelming and make it difficult to find the right words to say at a funeral or memorial. Reciting a poem is a powerful way to honor a loved one.

Here is a collection of expressive poems. To make it easier to find the perfect poem we organized them by family member: mother, father, child, spouse, grandma, grandpa, and friend, as well as classic and modern selections.

Funeral Poems

Families often look for poems to read and share during the funeral or memorial service. Poems can also be used in obituaries and sympathy cards to articulate the feelings of the bereaved.

Poetry can be comforting in times of inexpressible grief. It can also help you find a voice to convey your feelings as you honor your loved one.

When choosing an appropriate funeral poem, search for ones that capture the essence of the deceased or your relationship with them. It may be as simple as reading their favorite poem. It may not seem to fit at first, but often it is the most poignant choice.

Outlined below are some of the best funeral poems for readings at funeral services.

Classic Funeral Poems

Many classical poems express an appreciation of the natural world or address the subjects of death directly. These all contain meaningful messages to recite during a funeral service. Here are some famous and classic funeral poems.

Warm Summer Sun by Mark Twain

Warm Summer Sun

Warm summer sun,
Shine kindly here,
Warm southern wind,
Blow softly here.
Green sod above,
Lie light, lie light.
Good night, dear heart,
Good night, good night.

Under the Harvest Moon by Carl Sandburg 

Under the Harvest Moon

Under the harvest moon,
When the soft silver
Drips shimmering
Over the garden nights,
Death, the gray mocker,
Comes and whispers to you
As a beautiful friend
Who remembers.

Under the summer roses
When the flagrant crimson
Lurks in the dusk
Of the wild red leaves,
Love, with little hands,
Comes and touches you
With a thousand memories,
And asks you
Beautiful, unanswerable questions.

Loss by Winifred M. Letts 

Loss

In losing you I lost my sun and moon
And all the stars that blessed my lonely night.
I lost the hope of Spring, the joy of June,
The Autumn’s peace, the Winter’s firelight.
I lost the zest of living, the sweet sense
Expectant of your step, your smile, your kiss;
I lost all hope and fear and keen suspense
For this cold calm, sans agony, sans bliss.
I lost the rainbow’s gold, the silver key
That gave me freedom of my town of dreams;
I lost the path that leads to Faërie
By beechen glades and heron-haunted streams.
I lost the master word, dear love, the clue
That threads the maze of life when I lost you.

Forever by Paul Laurence Dunbar

Forever

I had not known before
Forever was so long a word.
The slow stroke of the clock of time
I had not heard.

‘Tis hard to learn so late;
It seems no sad heart really learns,
But hopes and trusts and doubts and fears,
And bleeds and burns.

The night is not all dark,
Nor is the day all it seems,
But each may bring me this relief—
My dreams and dreams.

I had not known before
That Never was so sad a word,
So wrap me in forgetfulness—
I have not heard.

Do Not Stand At My Grave And Weep by Mary Elizabeth Frye

Do Not Stand At My Grave And Weep

Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning’s hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there. I did not die.

I Heard Your Voice In The Wind Today by Unknown

I Heard Your Voice In The Wind Today

I heard your voice in the wind today
and I turned to see your face;
The warmth of the wind caressed me
as I stood silently in place.
I felt your touch in the sun today
as its warmth filled the sky;
I closed my eyes for your embrace
and my spirit soared high.
I saw your eyes in the window pane
as I watched the falling rain;
It seemed as each raindrop fell
it quietly said your name.
I held you close in my heart today
it made me feel complete;
You may have died…but you are not gone
you will always be a part of me.
As long as the sun shines…
the wind blows…
the rain falls…
You will live on inside of me forever
for that is all my heart knows.

Because I could not stop for Death (479) by Emily Dickinson

Because I could not stop for Death (479)

Because I could not stop for Death –
He kindly stopped for me –
The Carriage held but just Ourselves –
And Immortality.

We slowly drove – He knew no haste
And I had put away
My labor and my leisure too,
For His Civility –

We passed the School, where Children strove
At Recess – in the Ring –
We passed the Fields of Gazing Grain –
We passed the Setting Sun –

Or rather – He passed us –
The Dews drew quivering and chill –
For only Gossamer, my Gown –
My Tippet – only Tulle –

We paused before a House that seemed
A Swelling of the Ground –
The Roof was scarcely visible –
The Cornice – in the Ground –

Since then – ’tis Centuries – and yet
Feels shorter than the Day
I first surmised the Horses’ Heads
Were toward Eternity –

Modern Funeral Poems

Modern poetry is filled with poems that articulate the overwhelming feelings of losing someone. These are five of the best modern funeral poems to read during a service.

A Song Of Living by Amelia Josephine Burr

A Song Of Living

Because I have loved life, I shall have no sorrow to die.
I have sent up my gladness on wings, to be lost in the blue of the sky.
I have run and leaped with the rain, I have taken the wind to my breast.
My cheeks like a drowsy child to the face of the earth I have pressed.
Because I have loved life, I shall have no sorrow to die.

I have kissed young love on the lips, I have heard his song to the end,
I have struck my hand like a seal in the loyal hand of a friend.
I have known the peace of heaven, the comfort of work done well.
I have longed for death in the darkness and risen alive out of hell.
Because I have loved life, I shall have no sorrow to die.

I gave a share of my soul to the world, when and where my course is run.
I know that another shall finish the task I surely must leave undone.
I know that no flower, nor flint was in vain on the path I trod.
As one looks on a face through a window, through life I have looked on God,
Because I have loved life, I shall have no sorrow to die.

There Is No Night Without A Dawning by Helen Steiner Rice

There Is No Night Without A Dawning

No winter without a spring
And beyond the dark horizon
Our hearts will once more sing ….
For those who leave us for a while
Have only gone away
Out of a restless, care worn world
Into a brighter day

The Life That I Have by Leo Marks

The Life That I Have

The life that I have
Is all that I have
And the life that I have
Is yours

The love that I have
Of the life that I have
Is yours and yours and yours.

A sleep I shall have
A rest I shall have
Yet death will be but a pause
For the peace of my years
In the long green grass
Will be yours and yours and yours.

My Memory Library by Sarah B. Blackstone

My Memory Library

Imagine if I was given one moment,
just a single slice of my past.
I could hold it close forever,
and that moment would always last.

I’d put the moment in a safe,
within my heart’s abode.
I could open it when I wanted,
and only I would know the code.

I could choose a time of laughing,
a time of happiness and fun.
I could choose a time that tried me
through everything I’ve done.

I sat and thought about what moment
would always make me smile.
One that would always push me
to walk that extra mile.

If I’m feeling sad and low,
if I’m struggling with what to do,
I can go and open my little safe
and watch my moment through.

There are moments I can think of
that would lift my spirits every time.
The moments when you picked me up,
when the road was hard to climb.

For me to only pick one moment
to cherish, save and keep
is proving really difficult,
as I’ve gathered up a heap!

I’ve dug deep inside my heart,
found the safe and looked inside
There was room for lots of moments;
in fact, hundreds if I tried.

I’m building my own little library,
embedded in my heart,
for all the moments spent with you
before you had to part.

I can open it up whenever I like,
pick a moment and watch it through,
My little library acts as a promise
I’ll never ever forget you.

 To Those Whom I Love & Those Who Love Me by Anonymous

To Those Whom I Love & Those Who Love Me

When I am gone, release me, let me go.
I have so many things to see and do,
You mustn’t tie yourself to me with too many tears,
But be thankful we had so many good years.

I gave you my love, and you can only guess
How much you’ve given me in happiness.
I thank you for the love that you have shown,
But now it is time I traveled on alone.

So grieve for me a while, if grieve you must,
Then let your grief be comforted by trust.
It is only for a while that we must part,
So treasure the memories within your heart.

I won’t be far away for life goes on.
And if you need me, call and I will come.

Though you can’t see or touch me, I will be near.
And if you listen with your heart, you’ll hear,
All my love around you soft and clear.

And then, when you come this way alone,
I’ll greet you with a smile and a ‘Welcome Home’.

Poetry Notebook

Funeral Poems for Mom

Below is a selection of funeral poems suitable for mothers. They express love, longing, and appreciation for a mom who had a huge impact on someone’s life. (all of them)

In Memory Of My Mother by Patrick Kavanagh

In Memory of My Mother

I do not think of you lying in the wet clay
Of a Monaghan graveyard; I see
You walking down a lane among the poplars
On your way to the station, or happily

Going to second Mass on a summer Sunday –
You meet me and you say:
‘Don’t forget to see about the cattle – ‘
Among your earthiest words the angels stray.

And I think of you walking along a headland
Of green oats in June,
So full of repose, so rich with life –
And I see us meeting at the end of a town

On a fair day by accident, after
The bargains are all made and we can walk
Together through the shops and stalls and markets
Free in the oriental streets of thought.

O you are not lying in the wet clay,
For it is a harvest evening now and we
Are piling up the ricks against the moonlight
And you smile up at us – eternally.

Mother in Gladness, Mother in Sorrow by W. Dayton Wedgefarth

Mother in Gladness, Mother in Sorry

Mother in gladness, Mother in sorrow,
Mother today, and Mother tomorrow,
With arms ever open to fold and caress you
O Mother of Mine, may God keep you and bless you.

Mother in gladness, Mother in sorrow,
Mother today, and Mother tomorrow,
With arms ever open to fold and caress you
O Mother of Mine, may God keep you and bless you.

Kaddish by David Ignatow

Kaddish

Mother of my birth, for how long were we together
in your love and my adoration of your self?
For the shadow of a moment, as I breathed your pain
and you breathed my suffering. As we knew
of shadows in lit rooms that would swallow the light.

Your face beneath the oxygen tent was alive
but your eyes closed, your breathing hoarse.
Your sleeping was with death. I was alone
with you as when I was young
but now only alone, not with you,
to become alone forever, as I was learning
watching you become alone.

Earth now is your mother, as you were mine, my earth,
my sustenance and my strength,
and now without you I turn to your mother
and seek from her that I may meet you again
in rock and stone. Whisper to the stone,
I love you. Whisper to the rock, I found you.
Whisper to the earth, Mother, I have found her,
and I am safe and always have been.

The Mother by Robert William Service

The Mother

Your children grow from you apart,
Afar and still afar;
And yet it should rejoice your heart
To see how glad they are;
In school and sport, in work and play,
And last, in wedded bliss
How others claim with joy to-day
The lips you used to kiss.

Your children distant will become,
And wide the gulf will grow;
The lips of loving will be dumb,
The trust you used to know
Will in another’s heart repose,
Another’s voice will cheer…
And you will fondle baby clothes
And brush away a tear.

But though you are estranged almost,
And often lost to view,
How you will see a little ghost
Who ran to cling to you!
Yet maybe children’s children will
Caress you with a smile…
Grandmother love will bless you still,-
Well, just a little while.

She Walks in Beauty by Lord Byron

She Walks in Beauty

She walks in beauty, like the night
Of cloudless climes and starry skies;
And all that’s best of dark and bright
Meet in her aspect and her eyes;
Thus mellowed to that tender light
Which heaven to gaudy day denies.

One shade the more, one ray the less,
Had half impaired the nameless grace
Which waves in every raven tress,
Or softly lightens o’er her face;
Where thoughts serenely sweet express,
How pure, how dear their dwelling-place.

And on that cheek, and o’er that brow,
So soft, so calm, yet eloquent,
The smiles that win, the tints that glow,
But tell of days in goodness spent,
A mind at peace with all below,
A heart whose love is innocent!

Funeral Poems for Dad

These poems honor fathers and are appropriate for funeral and memorial service readings. These are poems that express longing for the presence of a nurturing man and a loving dad.

Do not go gentle into that good night by Dylan Thomas 

Do not go gentle into that good night

Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Nothing Is Lost by Anne Barbara Ridler

Nothing Is Lost

Nothing is lost.
We are too sad to know that, or too blind;
Only in visited moments do we understand:
It is not that the dead return —
They are about us always, though unguessed.

This penciled Latin verse
You dying wrote me, ten years past and more,
Brings you as much alive to me as the self you wrote it for,
Dear father, as I read your words
With no word but Alas.

Lines in a letter, lines in a face
Are the faithful currents of life: the boy has written
His parents across his forehead, and as we burn
Our bodies up each seven years,
His own past self has left no plainer trace.

Nothing dies.
The cells pass on their secrets, we betray them
Unknowingly: in a freckle, in the way
We walk, recall some ancestor,
And Adam in the color of our eyes.

Yes, on the face of the new born,
Before the soul has taken full possession,
There pass, as over a screen, in succession
The images of other beings:
Face after face looks out, and then is gone.

Nothing is lost, for all in love survive.
I lay my cheek against his sleeping limbs
To feel if he is warm, and touch in him
Those children whom no shawl could warm,
No arms, no grief, no longing could revive.

Thus what we see, or know,
Is only a tiny portion, at the best,
Of the life in which we share; an iceberg’s crest
Our sunlit present, our partial sense,
With deep supporting multitudes below.

Requiem by Robert Louis Stevenson

Requiem

Under the wide and starry sky,
    Dig the grave and let me lie.
Glad did I live and gladly die,
    And I laid me down with a will.

This be the verse you grave for me:
    Here he lies where he longed to be;
Home is the sailor, home from sea,
    And the hunter home from the hill
.

To His Dead Body by Siegfried Sassoon

To His Dead Body

When roaring gloom surged inward and you cried,
Groping for friendly hands, and clutched, and died,
Like racing smoke, swift from your lolling head
Phantoms of thought and memory thinned and fled.

Yet, though my dreams that throng the darkened stair
Can bring me no report of how you fare,
Safe quit of wars, I speed you on your way
Up lonely, glimmering fields to find new day,
Slow-rising, saintless, confident and kind—
Dear, red-faced father God who lit your mind.

To My Father by Georgia Harkness

To My Father

A giant pine, magnificent and old
Stood staunch against the sky and all around
Shed beauty, grace and power.
Within its fold birds safely reared their young.
The velvet ground beneath was gentle,
and the cooling shade gave cheer to passers by.
Its towering arms a landmark stood, erect and unafraid,
As if to say, “Fear naught from life’s alarms”.

It fell one day.
Where it had dauntless stood was loneliness and void.
But men who passed paid tribute – and said,
“To know this life was good,
It left it’s mark on me. Its work stands fast”.
And so it lives. Such life no bonds can hold –
This giant pine, magnificent and old.

Funeral Poems for a Child

The funeral poems below are meaningful examples to read during a funeral service that articulate the sorrow and grief of a lost child.

Portrait of a Father After His Son’s Memorial Service by Rigoberto González

Portrait of a Father After His Son’s Memorial Service

There’s a man who sits on a bench
waiting for a train, though the trains
arrive and depart and the man remains
seated, the heaviness of resignation on

his face. As evening falls the light flickers
awake in the waiting room and a moth
begins to flutter in and out of sight
until it rests finally on the white bulb

above his head. All things come to calm
this way—even the trains. The cycles
of grinding metal stretch out into yawns—
each iron wheel a flower folding its petals in.

Night concludes its hymn. The man rises but
hesitates to leave this station of his cross.

To Theodore by George Marion McClellan

To Theodore

Such are the little memories of you;
They come and go, return and lie apart
From all main things of life; yet more than they,
With noiseless feet, they come and grip the heart.
Gay laughter leading quick and stormy tears,
Then smiles again and pulse of flying feet,
In breathless chase of fleeting gossamers,
Are memories so dear, so bitter-sweet.

No more are echoes of your flying feet.
Hard by, where Pike’s Peak rears its head in state,
The erstwhile rushing feet, with halting steps,
For health’s return in Denver watch and wait.
But love and memories of noiseless tread,
Where angels hovered once, all shining fair,
To tuck you in your little trundle bed,
Kneel nightly now in agony of prayer.

My Mother and Lucille Clifton Have Tea by Parneshia Jones

My Mother and Lucille Clifton Have Tea

When I get to where I’m going
I want the death of my children explained to me.

                                                       —Lucille Clifton

They meet over tea and potato chips.
Brown and buttermilk women,
hipped and hardened,
legs uncrossed but proper
still in their smiles;
smiles that carry a sadness in faint creases.
A sadness they will never be without.

One asks the other,
“What do they call a woman who has lost a child?”

The other sighs between sips of lukewarm tea.
There is no name for us.

“No name? But there has to be a name for us.
We must have something to call ourselves.”

Surely, history by now and all the women
who carry their babies’ ghosts on their backs,
mothers who wake up screaming,
women wide awake in their nightmares,
mothers still expected to be mothers and human,
women who stand under hot showers weeping,
mothers who wish they could drown standing up,
women who can still smell them—hear them,
the scent and symphony of their children,
deep down in the good earth.

“Surely, history has not forgotten to name us?”

No woman wants to bear
whatever could be the name for this grief.
Even if she must bear the grief for all her days,
it would be far too painful to be called by that name.

“I’ve lost two, you know.”
Me too.
“I was angry at God, you know.”
Me too.
“I stopped praying but only for a little while,
and then I had no choice. I had to pray again.
I had to call out to something that was no longer there.
I had to believe God knew where it was.”

“I fear death no longer. It has taken everything.
But should I be? Should I be afraid of what death has taken?
That it took and left no name?”

The other who sighs between sips of lukewarm tea
leans over and kisses the cheek of the one still with questions.
She whispers…

No, you don’t have to be afraid.
Death is no more scary than the lives we have lived
without our babies, bound to this grief
with no name.

A Child Of Mine by Edgar Guest 

A Child Of Mine

I will lend you, for a little time,
A child of mine, He said.
For you to love the while he lives,
And mourn for when he’s dead.
It may be six or seven years,
Or twenty-two or three.
But will you, till I call him back,
Take care of him for Me?
He’ll bring his charms to gladden you,
And should his stay be brief.
You’ll have his lovely memories,
As solace for your grief.
I cannot promise he will stay,
Since all from earth return.
But there are lessons taught down there,
I want this child to learn.
I’ve looked the wide world over,
In search for teachers true.
And from the throngs that crowd life’s lanes,
I have selected you.
Now will you give him all your love,
Nor think the labour vain.
Nor hate me when I come
To take him home again?
I fancied that I heard them say,
‘Dear Lord, Thy will be done!’
For all the joys Thy child shall bring,
The risk of grief we’ll run.
We’ll shelter him with tenderness,
We’ll love him while we may,
And for the happiness we’ve known,
Forever grateful stay.
But should the angels call for him,
Much sooner than we’ve planned.
We’ll brave the bitter grief that comes,
And try to understand.

If I Could Hear Her by Carolyn Ferreira

If I Could Hear Her

I see your teardrops falling.
I hear you cry my name.
I know you cannot see me,
but I hold you just the same.

I watch as you lie abed
as restless as can be.
I hear your whispered words
as you pray for dreams of me.

Every day for you is painful.
Each breath, each step you take,
but as the wise mom, I know
a future you will make.

I envelope you in my love
as for me you used to do.
It’s hard to see you in such pain.
Forever the strong one’s been you.

Although our lives’ journeys
have bid us to be apart,
I am with you, you are with me,
always in our hearts.

Funeral Poems for Spouses and Lovers

Losing a partner is emotionally painful and it can be hard to put your feelings in words. The funeral poems below fully capture the sorrowful experience of losing a spouse or a lover.

Rooms Remembered by Laure-Anne Bosselaar

Rooms Remembered

I needed, for months after he died, to remember our rooms—
            some lit by the trivial, others ample

with an obscurity that comforted us: it hid our own darkness.
            So for months, duteous, I remembered: 

rooms where friends lingered, rooms with our beds,
            with our books, rooms with curtains I sewed

from bright cottons. I remembered tables of laughter,
            a chipped bowl in early light, black

branches by a window, bowing toward night, & those rooms,
            too, in which we came together

to be away from all. And sometimes from ourselves:
            I remembered that, also. 

But tonight—as I stand in the doorway to his room
            & stare at dusk settled there—

what I remember best is how, to throw my arms around his neck,
            I needed to stand on the tip of my toes. 

The Sadness of Clothes by Emily Fragos

The Sadness of Clothes

When someone dies, the clothes are so sad. They have outlived
their usefulness and cannot get warm and full.
You talk to the clothes and explain that he is not coming back

as when he showed up immaculately dressed in slacks and plaid jacket
and had that beautiful smile on and you’d talk.
You’d go to get something and come back and he’d be gone.

You explain death to the clothes like that dream.
You tell them how much you miss the spouse
and how much you miss the pet with its little winter sweater.

You tell the worn raincoat that if you talk about it,
you will finally let grief out. The ancients etched the words
for battle and victory onto their shields and then they went out

and fought to the last breath. Words have that kind of power
you remind the clothes that remain in the drawer, arms stubbornly
folded across the chest, or slung across the backs of chairs,

or hanging inside the dark closet. Do with us what you will,
they faintly sigh, as you close the door on them.
He is gone and no one can tell us where.

The Song of Despair by Pablo Neruda

The Song of Despair

The memory of you emerges from the night around me.
The river mingles its stubborn lament with the sea.

Deserted like the wharves at dawn.
It is the hour of departure, oh deserted one!

Cold flower heads are raining over my heart.
Oh pit of debris, fierce cave of the shipwrecked.

In you the wars and the flights accumulated.
From you the wings of the song birds rose.

You swallowed everything, like distance.
Like the sea, like time. In you everything sank!

It was the happy hour of assault and the kiss.
The hour of the spell that blazed like a lighthouse.

Pilot’s dread, fury of a blind diver,
turbulent drunkenness of love, in you everything sank!

In the childhood of mist my soul, winged and wounded.
Lost discoverer, in you everything sank!

You girdled sorrow, you clung to desire,
sadness stunned you, in you everything sank!

I made the wall of shadow draw back,
beyond desire and act, I walked on.

Oh flesh, my own flesh, woman whom I loved and lost,
I summon you in the moist hour, I raise my song to you.

Like a jar you housed the infinite tenderness,
and the infinite oblivion shattered you like a jar.

There was the black solitude of the islands,
and there, woman of love, your arms took me in.

There were thirst and hunger, and you were the fruit.
There were grief and the ruins, and you were the miracle.

Ah woman, I do not know how you could contain me
in the earth of yoursoul, in the cross of your arms!

How terrible and brief was my desire of you!
How difficult and drunken, how tensed and avid.

Cemetery of kisses, there is still fire in your tombs,
still the fruited boughs burn, pecked at by birds.

Oh the bitten mouth, oh the kissed limbs,
oh the hungering teeth, oh the entwined bodies.

Oh the mad coupling of hope and force
in which we merged and despaired.

And the tenderness, light as water and as flour.
And the word scarcely begun on the lips.

This was my destiny and in it was the voyage of my longing,
and in it my longing fell, in you everything sank!

Oh pit of debris, everything fell into you,
what sorrow did you not express, in what sorrow are you not drowned!

From billow to billow you still called and sang.
Standing like a sailor in the prow of a vessel.

You still flowered in songs, you still broke in currents.
Oh pit of debris, open and bitter well.

Pale blind diver, luckless slinger,
lost discoverer, in you everything sank!

It is the hour of departure, the hard cold hour
which the night fastens to all the timetables.

The rustling belt of the sea girdles the shore.
Cold stars heave up, black birds migrate.

Deserted like th wharves at dawn.
Only the tremulous shadow twists in my hands.

Oh farther than everything. Oh farther than everything.

It is the hour of departure. Oh abandoned one.

And What If I Spoke of the Hours by Chelsea Dingman

And What If I Spoke of the Hours

that we might’ve been together 
at the union hall, with the beer

bottles and the night that didn’t fall
away? I might’ve saved you from

that car ride to the end of this calm

world. Would we have been happy?
The morning you died, I slept.

I got the kids up for school in the dark. 
There were hours that I thought

you were alive. I keep thinking
about the cost of living. Your body,

unwrung and above me. Clothes
scattered like the hours you were

missing. What is happiness?
What I count on is the dark. The light.

Wanting to live anyway. The river
in my teeth and the reasonable grass

under my feet like someone I loved
once, impossibly alive.

Elegy for my husband by Toi Derricotte 

Elegy for my husband

What was there is no longer there:
Not the blood running its wires of flame through the whole length
Not the memories, the texts written in the language of the flat hills
No, not the memories, the porch swing and the father crying
The genteel and elegant aunt bleeding out on the highway
(Too black for the white ambulance to pick up)
Who had sent back lacquered plates from China
Who had given away her best ivory comb that one time she was angry
Not the muscles, the ones the white girls longed to touch
But must not (for your mother warned
You would be lynched in that all-white Ohio town you grew up in)
Not that same town where you were the only, the one good black boy
All that is gone
Not the muscles running, the baseball flying into your mitt
Not the hand that laid itself over my heart and saved me
Not the eyes that held the long gold tunnel I believed in
Not the restrained hand in love and in anger
Not the holding back
Not the taut holding

Funeral Poems for Grandmother

In your lifetime, you are likely to experience the death of a grandparent. It is devastating to lose a grandma who might have been a second mom to you. The following are suitable poems for readings at a funeral to express how you miss your grandmother.

The Rose Beyond the Wall by A.L. Frink

The Rose Beyond the Wall

A rose once grew where all could see
Sheltered beside a garden wall
And, as the days past swiftly by
It spread its branches, straight and tall

One day, a beam of light shone through
A crevice that had opened wide
The rose bent gently toward its warmth
Then passed beyond to the other side

Now, you who deeply feel its loss
Be comforted, the rose blooms there
It’s beauty even greater now
Nurtured by God’s own loving care.

Crossing the Bar by Alfred, Lord Tennyson 

Crossing the Bar

Sunset and evening star,
      And one clear call for me!
And may there be no moaning of the bar,
      When I put out to sea,

   But such a tide as moving seems asleep,
      Too full for sound and foam,
When that which drew from out the boundless deep
      Turns again home.

   Twilight and evening bell,
      And after that the dark!
And may there be no sadness of farewell,
      When I embark;

   For tho’ from out our bourne of Time and Place
      The flood may bear me far,
I hope to see my Pilot face to face
      When I have crost the bar.

An Admirable Woman by Crystal Foy

An Admirable Woman

There is a woman who always keeps her head up high.
Her eyes sparkle like a bright star in the sky.
She has the stamina, beauty, and courage that one would admire,
Even the love and happiness one inspires.
She is a women that one can always count on,
And a woman that sees no wrong.
Her beauty shines from the inside out,
It flows like a journey down a long route.
Her smile shines beautifully like the sun rising over the horizon,
And her intelligence, wisdom, and hard work are not surprising.
She is a genuinely caring women
Who goes the extra mile to help one in need or broken hearted,
And throughout all of her hard work,
No one ever sees her fall apart.

God’s Garden by Anonymous

God’s Garden

God looked around his garden
And found an empty place,
He then looked down upon the earth
And saw your tired face.
He put his arms around you
And lifted you to rest.
God’s garden must be beautiful
He always takes the best.
He knew that you were suffering
He knew you were in pain.
He knew that you would never
Get well on earth again.
He saw the road was getting rough
And the hills were hard to climb.
So he closed your weary eyelids
And whispered, ‘Peace bethine’.
It broke our hearts to lose you
But you didn’t go alone,
For part of us went with you
The day God called you home.

She Is Gone by David Harkins

She Is Gone

You can shed tears that she is gone
Or you can smile because she has lived

You can close your eyes and pray that she will come back
Or you can open your eyes and see all that she has left

Your heart can be empty because you can’t see her
Or you can be full of the love that you shared

You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday
Or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday

You can remember her and only that she is gone
Or you can cherish her memory and let it live on

You can cry and close your mind, be empty and turn your back
Or you can do what she would want: smile, open your eyes, love and go on.

Funeral Poems for Grandfather

Losing a grandfather is a sad and painful experience for a grandchild. It is like losing a father figure full of love and kindness. To help express how you miss him, the following funeral poems are appropriate to honor the memory of your grandad

For My Grandpa by Ilona M. Blake

For My Grandpa

I know we are all feeling a little bit sad
That we’ve lost our Grandpa, our friend, and our dad.
Together we have cried an ocean of tears
As we feel so empty and hold many fears.

But Grandpa would want us to know he’s in a good place
And that he’s watching us all with a smile on his face,
As we have made him so proud, as proud as can be
That he has raised such a beautiful and special family.

Thinking back now, I really must say
I feel lucky and privileged to have known Grandpa to this day.
For in my life, you have played a special part.
The memories I will treasure and keep close to my heart.

For me, I am glad my little baby he got to meet.
And for all of us, be grateful, his life is now complete.
To each one of us he has loved and cared.
As a family, be thankful for the good times we shared.

Although he has gone, we will always be together,
And his spirit will live on in each one of us forever.
When you look to the sky, look for the brightest star,
As that will be Grandpa looking down on us from afar.

And now I would like to thank the good Lord above
For blessing us with our Grandpa, with his kindness and love.
Dear God, if it is not too much fuss,
Take extra special care of our Grandpa, for he is very dear to us.

Grandpa, if you are listening, say a prayer for us every day.
Be sure to protect us and guide us on our way.
We know when God called you, you had to go,
But we want you to know, Grandpa, we miss you and love you so.

Funeral Blues by W. H. Auden

Funeral Blues

Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone,
Prevent the dog from barking with a juicy bone,
Silence the pianos and with muffled drum
Bring out the coffin, let the mourners come.

Let aeroplanes circle moaning overhead
Scribbling on the sky the message ‘He is Dead’.
Put crepe bows round the white necks of the public doves,
Let the traffic policemen wear black cotton gloves.

He was my North, my South, my East and West,
My working week and my Sunday rest,
My noon, my midnight, my talk, my song;
I thought that love would last forever: I was wrong.

The stars are not wanted now; put out every one,
Pack up the moon and dismantle the sun,
Pour away the ocean and sweep up the wood;
For nothing now can ever come to any good.

High Flight by John Gillespie Magee

High Flight

Oh! I have slipped the surly bonds of Earth
And danced the skies on laughter-silvered wings;
Sunward I’ve climbed, and joined the tumbling mirth
Of sun-split clouds, – and done a hundred things
You have not dreamed of – wheeled and soared and swung
High in the sunlit silence. Hov’ring there,
I’ve chased the shouting wind along, and flung
My eager craft through footless halls of air…

Up, up the long, delirious burning blue
I’ve topped the wind-swept heights with easy grace
Where never lark, or ever eagle flew –
And, while with silent, lifting mind I’ve trod
The high untrespassed sanctity of space,
Put out my hand, and touched the face of God.

To Laugh Often And Much by Ralph Waldo Emerson

To Laugh Often And Much

To laugh often and much;
to win the respect of the intelligent people
and the affection of children;
to earn the appreciation of honest critics
and endure the betrayal of false friends;
to appreciate beauty;
to find the best in others;
to leave the world a bit better
whether by a healthy child,
a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition;
to know that one life has breathed easier
because you lived here.
This is to have succeeded.

In Memoriam A. H. H. OBIIT MDCCCXXXIII: 11 by Alfred, Lord Tennyson 

In Memoriam A. H. H.

Calm is the morn without a sound,
         Calm as to suit a calmer grief,
         And only thro’ the faded leaf
The chestnut pattering to the ground:

Calm and deep peace on this high wold,
         And on these dews that drench the furze.
         And all the silvery gossamers
That twinkle into green and gold:

Calm and still light on yon great plain
         That sweeps with all its autumn bowers,
         And crowded farms and lessening towers,
To mingle with the bounding main:

Calm and deep peace in this wide air,
         These leaves that redden to the fall;
         And in my heart, if calm at all,
If any calm, a calm despair:

Calm on the seas, and silver sleep,
         And waves that sway themselves in rest,
         And dead calm in that noble breast
Which heaves but with the heaving deep.

Funeral Poems for a Friend

The following funeral poems capture the essence of a friendship—the kind of bond that outlives even death.

Travelling by William Wordsworth 

Travelling

This is the spot:—how mildly does the sun
Shine in between the fading leaves! the air
In the habitual silence of this wood
Is more than silent: and this bed of heath,
Where shall we find so sweet a resting-place?
Come!—let me see thee sink into a dream
Of quiet thoughts,—protracted till thine eye
Be calm as water when the winds are gone
And no one can tell whither.—my sweet friend!
We two have had such happy hours together
That my heart melts in me to think of it.

The Road Not Taken by Robert Frost

The Road Not Taken

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

Consolation by Robert Louis Stevenson 

Consolation

Though he, that ever kind and true,
Kept stoutly step by step with you,
Your whole long, gusty lifetime through,
      Be gone a while before,
Be now a moment gone before,
Yet, doubt not, soon the seasons shall restore
      Your friend to you.

He has but turned the corner — still
He pushes on with right good will,
Through mire and marsh, by heugh and hill,
      That self-same arduous way —
That self-same upland, hopeful way,
That you and he through many a doubtful day
      Attempted still.

He is not dead, this friend — not dead,
But in the path we mortals tread
Got some few, trifling steps ahead
      And nearer to the end;
So that you too, once past the bend,
Shall meet again, as face to face, this friend
      You fancy dead.

Push gaily on, strong heart! The while
You travel forward mile by mile,
He loiters with a backward smile
      Till you can overtake,
And strains his eyes to search his wake,
Or whistling, as he sees you through the brake,
      Waits on a stile.

How It Is by Maxine Kumin 

How It Is

Shall I say how it is in your clothes?
A month after your death I wear your blue jacket.   
The dog at the center of my life recognizes   
you’ve come to visit, he’s ecstatic.
In the left pocket, a hole.
In the right, a parking ticket
delivered up last August on Bay State Road.   
In my heart, a scatter like milkweed,
a flinging from the pods of the soul.
My skin presses your old outline.
It is hot and dry inside.

I think of the last day of your life,
old friend, how I would unwind it, paste   
it together in a different collage,
back from the death car idling in the garage,   
back up the stairs, your praying hands unlaced,   
reassembling the bits of bread and tuna fish   
into a ceremony of sandwich,
running the home movie backward to a space   
we could be easy in, a kitchen place
with vodka and ice, our words like living meat.

Dear friend, you have excited crowds
with your example. They swell
like wine bags, straining at your seams.   
I will be years gathering up our words,   
fishing out letters, snapshots, stains,
leaning my ribs against this durable cloth
to put on the dumb blue blazer of your death.

Elegy on Toy Piano by Dean Young

Elegy on Toy Piano

You don’t need a pony
to connect you to the unseeable
or an airplane to connect you to the sky.

Necessary it is to love to live
and there are many manuals
but in all important ways
one is on one’s own.

You need not cut off your hand.
No need to eat a bouquet.
Your head becomes a peach pit.
Your tongue a honeycomb.

Necessary it is to live to love,
to charge into the burning tower
then charge back out
and necessary it is to die.
Even for the trees, even for the pony
connecting you to what can’t be grasped.

The injured gazelle falls behind the
herd. One last wild enjambment.

Because of the sores in his mouth,
the great poet struggles with a dumpling.
His work has enlarged the world
but the world is about to stop including him.
He is the tower the world runs out of.

When something becomes ash,
there’s nothing you can do to turn it back.
About this, even diamonds do not lie.

Where To Find Poems

Countless poems have been written. Obviously, our selection is a drop of water in the sea. If you’re still looking for the perfect tribute to your loved one, the Poetry Foundation is a great place to start exploring. In particular, their collection titled Sorrow and Grieving is extremely powerful.

We have also collections of memorial poems and pet loss poems.

For hymns, see our favorite funeral hymns, and our collection of catholic funeral hymns.

For prayers, see funeral card prayers and memorial prayers.

FAQ

How do I pick an appropriate funeral poem?

To choose a suitable funeral poem for your loved one, look for poems that best capture your relationship with the deceased. Another option is to consider the favorite poem of the deceased. Regardless of subject matter, this is often the most poignant choice. A funeral poem does not just have to be about sadness and grief. It can also be about joy and hope.

What can you say in a funeral poem?

There are no rules regarding funeral poems. As a matter of fact, almost all words will take on special meaning in the context of a funeral. A funeral poem can talk about the feelings of grief and sorrow felt by the bereaved. Or it can be about the subjects of hope, family, and comfort during a difficult time. Use your imagination to honor your loved one in a truly unique way.

Can I include poems in eulogies and obituaries?

Yes. Adding poems to your eulogy is a great way to express your love and grief when honoring the memory of the deceased. It can enhance the eulogy and allow the listeners to relate to your speech. A short funeral poem can also be included in an obituary, which can be fitting especially if it articulately describes your grief.

Conclusion

Thanks for reading! We hope you find this helpful. If you have suggestions or feedback, send us an email at info@in-valhalla.com.

Headstone Cost – Complete Guide

Introduction

The right headstone can be a substantial expense.

During a time of loss, you might be overwhelmed with emotion. That’s a hard time to focus on making sound financial decisions.

We hope this guide will help remove the stress from choosing the best headstone for your loved one.

What Is a Headstone?

Cemetery With Headstones

A headstone is a marker placed over a grave. It is also called a grave tombstone, grave marker, or monument.

There are several types of headstone to choose from. The four main types are:

  • Flat Markers
  • Slant Markers
  • Bevel Markers
  • Upright Markers

How Much Does a Headstone Cost?

Headstones range in price from $134 to $4,500 or more depending on the type and other factors. Some even reach as much as $10,000 because of the complexity of design and other features.

Some factors that determine the price of a grave marker include:

  • Material
  • Design
  • Size
  • Color

To purchase a headstone, check out Everloved’s selection. (We recommend them because their website is easy to use, you can filter your options, and compare prices between different headstone companies. Besides, Everloved helps you make great funeral memorial sites and fundraisers.)

Material

Most headstones are made of granite, bronze or a combination of both. Options for design, embellishments, and engravings are similar across both materials, but bronze tombstones are more expensive because of raw material cost.

Design

To simplify the process and allow for affordable options, headstone manufacturers offer a variety of standard designs. If you select one of these choices, you will only have to give the name and dates of your loved one for engraving. 

Custom choices will increase the cost. And there are many ways to customize a headstone. You will have options to add pictures and illustrations such as flowers, emblems, flags, religious symbols, and even portraits. With custom options, there are countless ways to design a unique marker to honor the memory of your loved one.

Size

The larger the headstone, the higher the price. Tombstones are available in individual or companion (double) sizes. And each of these two categories also has a variety of sizes available.

Cemeteries usually allow a range of sizes for headstones depending on the dimension of your burial plot. However, you should check with the cemetery’s requirements about their allowed sizes and thickness before buying. 

Color

The color of the grave marker also influences the price. Gray headstones are usually the cheapest, while those in black and other rare colors tend to be the priciest.

Buying headstones from the cemetery is one option, but you may save a substantial amount by purchasing online directly from the manufacturer or other retailer.

Price of Headstones By Type

All prices mentioned will vary depending on the size, color, material, and design of the headstone.

Flat Marker

Flat markers, obvious from the name itself, are headstones that are set flat and flush to the ground. They are the cheapest type of headstone because of simple design. A basic flat marker is 3 to 4 inches thick, shaped in a rectangle, and has a polished surface.

These are also called grass markers, flush markers, and flat tombstones. See our article on grave markers for more information.

The general price range for a flat marker is $134 to $999 for individual sizes. For double (companion) sizes, the price range will be $699 to $1485. 

Bevel Marker

Bevel markers are also called pillow markers or bevel tombstones.

They also lay flat but the back is higher than the front. The slanted angle gives them a raised appearance and makes the marker appear upright. The top surface is polished while the edges left natural stone face.

Individual-sized bevel markers cost between $649 and $1,275. For companion sizes you can expect a range from $849 to $1,300.

Slant Marker

Slant markers are headstones that stand upright with its front face sloping from back to front. This type of headstone also features a polished face and rock pitched edges. They are usually installed on a base made of concrete or granite.

A slant marker for single burial costs between $899 and $1,689. For companion sizes, the range will be $1,199 to $1,899. 

Upright Marker

Upright markers are the traditional and classic type of headstone. It is usually a two-piece set with the upright block called the “die” and the base supporting it called a “tablet”.

Some headstone dealers feature upright markers that are cut in creative shapes such as hearts, teardrops, and roses which cost more depending on the level of detail involved.

This type of headstone is the most expensive. Upright markers in individual sizes range from $1,349 to $2,295. Companion sizes start at $1,549 and go to $3,095.

Headstone Markers for Veterans

The Veterans Administration (VA) will furnish a government headstone or marker for the unmarked grave of any deceased eligible veteran in any cemetery around the world, regardless of their date of death. They do this at no cost to the family.

To receive a headstone, marker, or medallion, you must submit a VA Form 40-1330, Claim for Standard Government Headstone or Marker or VA Form 40-1330M, Claim for Government Medallion to the VA along with proof of military service, to request a Government-provided headstone or marker.

Additional Costs

Upright Marker Headstones in Cemetery

Be prepared for extra expenses you might encounter when purchasing a headstone. Besides those listed below, headstone cleaning and maintenance are things to ask your cemetery about.

Shipping

The shipping fees will vary depending on the distance, as well as the weight and size of the grave marker. However, there are retailers whose price includes shipping. Make sure to read the product details when you are comparing your options.

Installation Fees

Cemeteries may charge installation fees for the headstone. This fee can range from $50 to $500 depending on your grave marker and the location of the cemetery. 

Other Considerations

Any cemetery will allow you to buy from the supplier of your choice, but you must be familiar with the cemetery requirements.

Cemeteries have guidelines regarding size, material, and design of headstones. These regulations vary depending on the cemetery, so make sure to check with their rules first before buying a headstone from an outside retailer.

If you fail to follow the rules of the cemetery, they might refuse installation of your purchased headstone.

FAQ

How much does a headstone cost?

The price of a headstone ranges from $134 to $4,500. It varies widely depending on size, material, design, and color. Headstones that are complex and have extensive designs can reach as much as $10,000.

What is the cheapest headstone?

The least expensive type of headstone is a flat marker because of its simple design. When it comes to the pricing of headstones, the cheapest ones will be those that are smallest and with little to no design.

Do I have to purchase a headstone directly from the cemetery?

You can buy from a third-party retailer or even online companies. In most cases, you can save money by buying from outside vendors.

Can I buy any headstone that I want?

No. Although you are free to purchase a headstone from an outside vendor, you must still adhere to the rules and regulations of the cemetery regarding required size, design, and material. If you fail to do so, they might refuse your headstone at the time of installation. Restrictions vary depending on the cemetery so make sure to ask them first before buying.

How much does it cost to install a headstone?

Installation fees for headstones can cost between $50 to $500 or more. It is important to note that professionals will handle the installation for you.

Can I install the headstone myself?

A few cemeteries might allow this, but it is not recommended. It is best to let professionals handle the installation of the headstone.

Conclusion

Thanks for reading! We hope you find this helpful. If you have suggestions or feedback, send us an email at info@in-valhalla.com.

Ziegler Case Casket – Complete Guide + What Is It?

Introduction

Many times a body needs to be transported and it must be done in a sealed container. The most common container for transporting bodies is a Ziegler casket.

What Is a Ziegler Case Casket?

Ziegler Case Casket

A Ziegler casket is a metal shipping container used for human remains. It is also called a Ziegler case or a Ziegler shipping container. It can serve as an insert placed inside a casket, or as a separate container altogether. Most often they are used for transporting remains that are not placed in caskets.

Use of Ziegler Caskets

When shipping human remains, some concerns are leaking fluids, odor, and keeping the body secure during transport. A Ziegler case casket addresses these issues by preventing leakage and containing the odor from decaying human remains.

Ziegler caskets are most commonly used for human remains that have already started to decompose. Another use is for souls that died from highly infectious diseases.

For these reasons, many countries require that incoming bodies are transported in Ziegler case caskets if the body is not being transported in a traditional casket that is sealed.

An alternative to a Ziegler casket is an air tray. It is much cheaper—though requires a casket—and is designed especially for air transport. An air tray is an outer container that protects the casket to meet handling requirements.

Ziegler case caskets are commonly used for international shipping of human remains. They are designed to keep the body from rapidly decomposing during transport.

And they are often used by the military for transporting bodies flown in military cargo planes. Ziegler caskets are commonly draped with American flags. 

Why Is It Called a “Ziegler” Casket?

“Ziegler” is the brand name of one specific manufacturer. Over time, “Ziegler casket” became the common term for any metal case used for transporting bodies, regardless of manufacturer.

Ziegler Casket Construction

A Ziegler case casket is made of light steel (usually 20-gauge). It opens from the top and the lid is secured with screws to produce and air-tight seal.

Standard dimensions of a Ziegler case are 75 inches long and 20 inches wide. Total weight is around 65 pounds. These numbers are similar to regular casket dimensions and weights. Here is a listing for more Ziegler measurement information.

A Ziegler casket does not have an interior lining. After placing the body inside the container, the Ziegler case will be hermetically sealed (airtight). A gasket creates a seal when the lid is secured with threaded fasteners..

Ziegler case caskets are also sometimes called body transfer cases or shipping cases because of their function.

Ziegler Casket as Alternative to Embalming

A body may need to be moved a long distance or repatriated to their home country. This case usually requires embalming the body first, but an alternative is to use a Ziegler casket.

Embalming may or may not take place before transport, but Ziegler cases or air trays are a common solution if the final intent is to cremate the body. (The loved one will still be cremated in a cremation casket or cardboard casket.)

What is Embalming?

The process of embalming involves the draining of blood from the body and replacing it with a chemical. It addresses the concerns regarding decomposition, specifically containing the odor during transport. This is a legitimate concern especially if the human remains are placed in a wooden casket (which cannot be sealed airtight).

However, embalming may not be allowed in some cultures and religions such as the Jewish tradition. There are also some cases when a body is not allowed to be chemically embalmed for medical purposes.

And families may refuse the embalming process based on personal preferences. The process of embalming is considered by some to be invasive, as it uses toxic chemicals that are harmful to human health and the environment.

Training and expertise is required for embalming. Because of the chemicals used professional practitioners take many precautions to protect themselves.

What If I Don’t Want To Embalm the Body?

If the family wishes not to embalm the body, a Ziegler casket is a great option for transport. Because it is hermetically sealed, it is also leak-proof and odor resistant. It is sometimes used with cooling materials to slow down the decomposition of the body inside. This way, the family can still hold viewings and visitations for the person after the body is transported.

Transport Regulations for Human Remains

Airplane in the Sky

Remember, when you are transporting human remains out of the country, you need to comply with the regulations of the airline company, as well as the regulations of the country where it is being transferred.

Most human remains transferred out of the US are not placed in traditional caskets. And this is when a Ziegler is most often used.

Some states like Michigan have regulations  regarding transport. They require that bodies past 48 hours (dead) must either be embalmed or sealed in a Ziegler shipping container.

Funeral directors may suggest that embalming is required (before transport) for all bodies that are 48 hours passed the time of death. However, this is not true in the majority of cases. If the family wishes to avoid embalming, they have the option to transfer the body in a Ziegler casket instead.

FAQ

What is a Ziegler casket used for?

A Ziegler case is usually used for transporting human remains that are not placed in traditional caskets. They are also commonly used as containers for shipping bodies that are not embalmed.

Is a Ziegler casket required when transporting a body?

It depends on whether the body has been embalmed or not, if the transport is international, as well as regulations of the airline involved. Many companies allow air trays and combination units for embalmed bodies. For un-embalmed bodies, sealed metal containers such as Ziegler caskets are usually required, especially for international transport. It is best to check with the state or country officials both at the origin and destination to know the full details of the regulations and requirements.

Is a Ziegler casket different from an air tray?

Yes. An air tray is an outer container that protects a full casket to meet handling requirements. A Ziegler casket is a metal container that is hermetically sealed and can be used as a casket itself or serve as a liner for a casket.

Is embalming required before transporting human remains?

No. You can transport bodies that are not embalmed using acceptable caskets and containers, such as a Ziegler case. One alternative to a Ziegler case is an are air tray and combination unit.

Can I bury a Ziegler casket?

No. Ziegler caskets are not meant for burials. They are only used as shipping containers for human remains.

Conclusion

Thanks for reading! We hope you find this helpful. If you have suggestions or feedback, send us an email at info@in-valhalla.com.

Casket Blankets – Complete Guide + Ideas

Introduction

A casket blanket is one of the most beautiful floral arrangements used to adorn a casket.

Covering your loved one with a blanket of flowers radiates love and care, which helps bring about a positive atmosphere to a funeral service.

What Are Casket Blankets?

A casket blanket is simply a blanket of flowers that is draped over the entire casket or the lower half of an open casket. They are simply constructed using a piece of fabric such as burlap for the base. Fresh flowers are then attached using wire and floral adhesive to create the shape of a blanket.

In contrast to a casket spray a blanket covers more of the casket, and is literally draped over the top. Usually they are large enough to cover all sides of the casket and sometimes flow all the way down to the floor.

Casket Blanket Costs

In general, casket blankets will cost more than casket sprays simply because they are larger. While some casket sprays are priced under $100, you’ll struggle to find a blanket in that same range. Expect to pay $150 or higher.

We provide links throughout this article to casket blanket listings with live prices so you can get a sense of the the range.

What Are Flower Blankets Used For?

A casket blanket is largely used for aesthetic purposes. There are many options of flower arrangements that you can put on top of a casket, and a casket blanket is just one of them. Other options include wreaths, stands, etc.

The practice of placing a flower design on the casket began millennia ago. It is simply a way of offering respect to the deceased. Flowers are a beautiful, elegant way to symbolize life, to honor the memories of the person that will be well-remembered after passing.

Casket blankets resemble funeral palls used in Christian funerals. A pall is a large cloth that covers the casket during the liturgy.

A pall … placed over the body when it is received at the church [is a] reminder of the baptismal garment of the deceased … a sign of the Christian dignity of the person. The use of the pall also signifies that all are equal in the eyes of God.

The Order of Christian Funerals

The funeral pall has a special meaning in Christian funerals.

Florists might have gained inspiration from their use to make a floral version of the covering. While a pall is traditionally a piece of cloth that covers the casket at funerals, a casket blanket is more unique and elegant in style.

Which Type of Casket is Best for a Flower Blanket?

Casket blankets are best used on fully closed caskets. The blanket will cover most or all the top of the casket and drape over the sides. In this case, full-couch caskets that remain closed during the service are well-suited for casket blankets.

Casket blankets are most commonly used in closed casket services, but can also be used in open casket viewings.

For a half-couch casket used for an open viewing, you simply drape the casket blanket over the enclosed portion (bottom). It will appear that the casket blanket is keeping the deceased warm with a blanket of flowers from the waist down.

Half-couch blankets are less common than full couch funeral blankets. If you purchase one, make sure the supplier knows to make a smaller version so the flower blanket isn’t too long.

Flower Blanket Arrangements

Casket Blankets For Mom

Casket blankets meant for mothers are best with feminine colors and design. This pink casket blanket called “Her Blanket of Love” is from From You Flowers. It is made of roses, alstroemeria, orchids, gladiolus, mums, asters, carnations, heather, and lilies. The design captures motherly love, and the colors symbolize the compassionate and nurturing side of mothers.

Casket Blankets For Dad

This white casket blanket from Designs by Gail Floral  is made of gerbera daisies, calla lilies, and anthurium. This is suitable to be dedicated to fathers. White symbolizes peace and spirituality. This white casket blanket captures the strength and goodness of fathers.

Casket Blankets For A Child

Small White Casket Blanket for Child
Source: Bloom Nation

A white casket blanket is also fit for a child because it symbolizes youth, innocence, and purity.

This casket blanket is made of white chrysanthemums, roses, double lisianthus, Bells of Ireland, ivy, sword fern, and a variety of lush greens. This white casket blanket from Bloom Nation serves as a gentle hug for a young loved one.

Religious Flower Blankets

Casket blankets are easy to customize. One way is to display your religious beliefs. You can design a blanket that incorporates symbols to add meaning. For example, this religious casket blanket features red flowers in the shape of cross contrasting a bed of white flowers.

Religious Full Couch Casket Blanket
Source: Pinterest

Patriotic Flower Blankets

patriotic casket blanket portraying the American flag, in red, white, and blue honors the dedication of veterans in the Army, Navy, Air Force, or Marine Corps.

This patriotic casket blanket from Wright Flower Company is commonly dedicated to those who served in the military.

Unique Options

A casket blanket is not always made of flowers. This unique casket blanket from Flowers by Pouparina is made of salal leaves, ferns, and buttons.

This is a more subtle option for anyone with an aversion to flowers.

Custom Design

Flower designs leave a lot of room for creativity. You are really only limited by imagination.

If you have a personal design in mind to honor your loved one, odds are, it can be made.

For example, this custom casket blanket from Lemon Leaf Florist was made in Kentucky Derby style.

Be advised, custom orders can add to the lead time.

FAQ

What is a casket blanket?

A casket blanket is a blanket of flowers draped over the top of the casket. It can be placed on the entire casket (for closed casket viewings) or draped over the bottom portion only (for open casket viewings with a half-couch casket).

How is a casket blanket made?

It is constructed by attaching flowers to a piece of fabric, such as burlap. Fresh flowers and/or foliage are often attached to the cloth using floral adhesive or wires.

Can I use a casket blanket in a half-couch casket?

Yes. Casket blankets are often used for closed caskets, but they can also be used in half couch caskets for open viewings. You can just drape the casket blanket over the bottom portion of the casket.

Conclusion

Thanks for reading! We hope you find this helpful. If you have suggestions or feedback, send us an email at info@in-valhalla.com.